Existential ocd moment or something else?

I can’t stop thinking about death today. Not like suicide or pondering how I could die. Just more so I’m going to die. It’s like. I was eating my pizza today listening to music and looking at the clouds. And I was like I love this this is amazing. And then Brain says “ur gonna die one day btw” Or I redid my wallpaper on my phone and I love the way it looks. I unlock my screen and admire the vibe I’ve created. And then brain says “one day you’ll be dead” When I feel a moment of joy or happiness or peace is when the thought screams at me. I’m really unsettled and distraught about thinking about being dead one day. This doesn’t come up often like other thoughts I have but I hate this one because it’s hard to cope with. Because I do the things and “techniques” to make them quieter. But then immediately Brain says “why are u even trying tho. It’s pointless because you’ll be dead one day.” Any advice ??

chaitea

Date posted: 6w

I have these thoughts a lot too. For me, the pleasure is the point. There doesn’t have to be a future payoff. Life doesn’t have to accrue value. If it’s all going to end, it’s an even better reason to really enjoy the activities I’m doing now. Play the game, see your friends, make the cute wallpaper because it feels good now.

bugzee

Date posted: 6w

@chaitea Does it help if u try to redirect ur thoughts and tell ur self the point of life is to enjoy it. Or does it make the “ur gonna die one day” thoughts worse. For me. Sometimes trying to combat the thoughts works. Sometimes it doesn’t. I’m just curious of ur experience with that.

chaitea

Date posted: 6w

@bugzee I do best when I practice getting out of the internal monologue by focusing on the sensation— both the physical sensation of touching my mousepad while playing a game, for instance, but also the sense of pleasure itself ~as~ pleasure and not as some cognitive rationalization of why I’m enjoying it or an analysis of the experience or object. I’m still working on this habit, but it’s been going well this month with the exception of a couple days. I feel like I was constantly spiraling all last year, but getting better at staying present has been so helpful.

bugzee

Date posted: 6w

@chaitea I like this. I will try it. Thank you! And I’m glad you are finding ways to overcome this :)

Stay.Fluid

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w

Sounds like existential OCD to me. This theme is one I suffered for quite some time, but got to the other side of. Keep enjoying those moments and thinking “I love this, this is amazing” And when those thoughts come to ruin your moment just acknowledge them and let them be. You’re doing awesome 🤩

bugzee

Date posted: 6w

@Stay.Fluid I will try that. Like radical acceptance right?

Dan Frijoles

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w

Honestly, you just need to sit with being anxious about the thought. I'm sorry to say it, but you will in fact be dead someday and you won't know if it's today, tomorrow, a month from now, or 80 years from now. Try to sit with the uncomfortable thoughts without trying to figure them out and enjoy your life while you're here. OCD is trying to rob you of the joy of the life you're living right now. Don't let it.

piinthesky

Date posted: 6w

I don't have any advice, but I can relate to having thoughts about being dead, soon

bugzee

Date posted: 6w

@piinthesky I am sorry friend

Draykewampler

Date posted: 18w

fear of death and ocd

so i have ocd but this is the main theme ive been dealing with for the last few months, im obsessed with my mortality and i feel trapped by the reality of death. i dont really believe in an afterlife which makes it scarier, not that i dont wanna my brain literally just wont let me. but i have daily panic attacks thinking about death all day, its honestly the toughest thing ive ever dealt with. does anybody have any tips on how they manage this if they have ever dealt with it? not looking for reassurance, just some non compulsive ways to kind of lessen the grip of the fear.

mossy123

Date posted: 16w

Existential ocd

So this past week I’ve had a really bad ocd spiral. I can’t stop thinking about death and what happens after. Because of this, I’ve felt no motivation to get out of bed. I don’t know if it’s burnout from school, depression, or just existential ocd. I can’t focus on the present,and I feel like I’m in a dream like state. I went through a similar time a few years ago, and was able to get out of it. Even if I do accept that death is inevitable, how do I get motivation to do anything when I know it won’t matter in the end? Any tips?

This is me!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 14w

Aging and death anxiety

I’ve been perturbed for a couple of months now with incessant thoughts about aging and dying. I really am not sure what to do. This feels like other OCD themes, but also really different, because this time, what I’m afraid of is sure to happen. I will either die, or age and then die. It’s been so difficult to enjoy anything lately. I just want to pull a blanket over my head and wait until death comes. Has anyone else felt this way? I feel quite alone. I am trying to enjoy life, but I just remember that it will all be gone in a flash. Nothing really seems to help me feel better. The only escape I have is in my dreams where I can fantasize about never aging or dying. Or at least being able to rewind the clock to have more time.

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Existential ocd moment or something else?

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