Religious ocd

Hey, I go through this too. It's hard to believe we could possibly be forgiven, again, and again, and again... But, we have God's promises to rely on. :-)

I think you will really like this video by Mark DeJesus. https://markdejesus.com/tag/belief/ Also, I really love John 3:19 which says: And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. I know it sounds strange to say I love that verse, but what I love is how it shows us what rejecting Christ looks like. It is not some accidental misstep where we think we believe but somehow didn't, or thought we repented but didn't. Condemnation comes when we continually, and never acknowledge that we are sinners in need of a Savior, and continue living just as we always have (in sinful dark deeds). What is VERY DIFFERENT, and really quite the opposite - is when we accept Christ we have the Holy Spirit, who helps us fight against our flesh. The fact that you acknowledge that things you do are not right shows that there is a battle going on inside of you. The non-Christian does not have this battle b/c they don't have the Holy Spirit waging war against their flesh. (See second half or Romans 7) I have found that by looking at things this way, we as Christian OCDers actually have so much evidence we can point to showing that our faith is indeed genuine. Also, I feel like keeping it simple is best when it comes to faith. John 3:16, Romans 10:9 are so straight forward - Believe in Christ (God's Son), that He was given by the Father - and we shall not perish but have eternal life. In the end - understanding God's grace and the fact that He is the reason we are saved (and not b/c of ourselves) is what brings freedom. I speak alot about grace in my book "Waging War Against OCD - A Christian Approach to Victory." (It's on Amazon) I hope this helps!

The fact that you are worried about truly repenting shows that you are really sorry. I am a catholic who struggles with this same thing. God gave us free will, we make mistakes and He is ready to forgive because He is all loving. However we can’t just expect His forgiveness we have to truly be sorry. I think that since you are worried about this you really are sorry. OCD attacks the things we are most certain about and tries to distort it. God will love you no matter what and He knows we will continue to make the same mistakes that doesn’t mean you aren’t sorry it is simply the weak nature of being a human and temptations caused by satan. Like I said ocd will attack those things you are most certain of and just by telling myself that it has really helped me!

There's some good Mark DeJesus videos about this on YouTube. When we have OCD, we tend to get stuck on these things and circle around and around and around about them. But God didn't design us to live that way. If you think about it, if God really made it that hard to be in a relationship with him, and everybody was agonizing over whether or not they had repented, then everyone in the world would be miserable. But God didn't design life to be that hard. In fact, he designed the Christian life to be simple. And full of freedom and love. But once you recognize that this is OCD, it can help you to try to stop circling around this theme. Tell yourself that God is going to take care of you :):):)