My arousal levels are just nothing they use to be I love my girl so much but I’m worried I turned gay and gonna have to leave her I don’t know what to do but I feel like she’s gonna notice my lack of arousal and question. I feel like I’m just gonna have to leave her until I get this sorted
I so badly don’t wanna loose her but I feel I have no options
I don’t wanna feel embarrassed and ashamed w performance I feel so weak
Someone please respond
No need to leave her. Someone just doesn’t turn gay. You’d have to be born that way. You’re just obsessed with the possibility of being gay. You are probably checking your arousals to see if you’re gay. Arousals don’t mean anything. They only mean that the equipment works. The body doesn’t know the difference btwn straight and gay porn. The only way to live with OCD is to welcome the uncertainty. When you are questioning yourself say “maybe I’m gay, maybe I’m not gay” , “Yes that thought gives me anxiety, I’m gonna handle the distress and move on”
The more you try to figure it out the deeper of a hole you’ll be in. I’ve struggled with this for 9 years. I’ve watched some porn that I wish I could unsee.
Mines been 4 years I can’t even imagine 9 I’m sorry to hear that have u gotten over it?
In times of distress, exhaustion etc our sex drive is naturally lower. Doesn’t mean you’re gay now. Maybe just too tired or worried to feel like having sex
MZ100 is absolutely right. I’m in the same boat as you. I’ve been doing extremely well past month but recently I’ve lowered my medication to try come off it and all my symptoms what I worried about before have come back. Keep going man, it’s so so difficult to accept the uncertainty but in the long run it helps. I’m married to a woman who we have two children with. It’s difficult trust me.
To a fair extent deep down I understand that I haven’t turned gay though it’s rlly hard to act like you’re ok when it’s on your mind all the time especially around my young gf whose gonna wanna be intiment often. It just feels so real cuz on top of it my sex drive is so down and the thoughts are always there so it just feels insanely real and I don’t know how to stop seeking reassurance or how to accept the uncertainty it feels close to impossible
I use to be crazy sexually active and I even remember my one friend telling me they were bisexual and I didn’t even understand how one could be. To now I’m always questioning myself and my sex drive has plunged I don’t understand how that could happen unless the thoughts had relevance
@Glassbox74743 Completely understand. My sex drive was beyond, pretty much sex addict to a point until this hit me. Don’t think I did anything for months which put a massive strain on my marriage. Though soon as I tried to accept the uncertainty, the better my sex drive came back
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
I just can’t do this shit anymore.im tired of these “arousal” sensations that feel real but when I go check my arousal to the same gender I just get anxiety. I’m tired of feeling like I can’t like girls anymore. I’m tired of my arousal getting blocked every now and then because I’m anxious. I’m tired of not knowing who I am anymore. I’m tired of having my mind putting me into an identity I never asked for. I’m tired of this life
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
