Help! Fear of negative thoughts never going away

I feel horrible! My anxiety over my obsessive thoughts is 10/10 right now and no matter what I try, I cannot seem to relax my body and mind. I had my 2nd therapy apt this morning. I watched a support group this evening, took a walk, did a 20 minute Prgressive muscle relaxation video, sat in the hottub, nothing is making my thoughts less intense. My stomach has been in knots for days and it’s only been getting worse. I have been trying to accept my anxiety and reason and let my thoughts stay all day they still have me super wound up.

Tristan M

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 7w

I’m going through that today, and believe me it’s terrible, but with enough practice, ERP will do its job! Just hang in there!

Eschmatter25

Date posted: 7w

OCD is a game of opposites. It attacks your values and all things you hold dear. By consciously sending “RELAX” command’s to your anxious brain raging w OCD, it will do the opposite. This can turn into a habit, consciously chasing “feeling better” The only way out, is in. OCD is NOTHING unless you make it something. Chin up!

Nicole B

Date posted: 7w

@Eschmatter25 Before I found NOCD this week, I was told this was all panic disorder, so I followed Drew Linsalata’s podcasts (and mostly ignored his OCD ones). That’s what he tells people to do - do the opposite and something about a Seinfeld episode reference with George. That was part of his notes on handling it before and it worked….for a while. I wasn’t on high alert, I spiraled this week and I’m not sure anymore what the right course of action is

Eschmatter25

Date posted: 7w

@Nicole B This shit isn’t linear, you’ll have peaks and valleys. Good Luck…keep pushing

Zoey98

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 7w

Hi! I totally understand how you feel ! I was in that spot last summer. My therapist helped me with accepting that the thoughts will be there and my job is to train my brain to not react as much to it. It seems impossible but ERP works. I still get the thoughts but my brain doesn’t try to escape anymore. Just doesn’t react as much anymore.

Nicole B

Date posted: 7w

@Zoey98 I’m only on my second therapy appt and they haven’t started ERP yet. I am going on vacation w my bf on Saturday. I fear I’m going to ruin our trip. Is there any ERP acceptance things that you would feel may be helpful to get me through it?

Zoey98

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 7w

@Nicole B @nicole B I’m also leaving for vacation this week and feel the exact same way that I’m going to ruin the trip. One way to help is to lower those expectations. I told my husband I am super anxious that I will be anxious and ruin the trip. Putting that out in the open helped. Then, I am just saying to my OCD- this trip is a chance for me to practice responding to the thoughts ( even though I don’t feel that way about them). It is not about me having the best time. It’s okay if I just want to get through it and don’t enjoy it that much. That’s a way to accept the OCD without fueling it. Talk back to it like it’s a bully- respond short and then let it be. My therapist taught me how to make “fun” of the bully- even though it is hurting your inner core. Saying something like, “ wow good one bully- that’s such a fun thought” (sarcastically). My husband also helps me do that. Now I am to the point that my brain automatically makes fun of it, and I don’t feel so overwhelmed. Again, it’s not about getting rid of the thoughts. It is about your reaction and you can train it. I doubted that it would work and felt miserable practicing my reactions, and here I am a year later and it 100% works.

Nicole B

Date posted: 7w

@Zoey98 Omg I love that! I did tell my boyfriend how I am feeling and brought up potentially canceling, but I know I shouldn’t and it’s nonrefundable. I love that you talk back to it like a bully and I especially love that your husband is so understanding. I’m still learning about OCD and I need to figure out how to work with my boyfriend to tackle parts of it together! I mean, we’re going on a trip together, his fun should be my fun and my discomfort should be his discomfort

Kruisergirl

Date posted: 7w

I’m so sorry. I’ve had days like that and it stinks. It really sucks. My best advice is to not engage with this. Such as “I’m noticing that I am ____. I’m going to focus on _____. (Whether it be doing a hobby or important project etc.)” Prayers and hugs to you 🫂

Nicole B

Date posted: 7w

@Kruisergirl I made myself confront it at every turn yesterday and it just got worse. Today, I tried something different and kept a list of things to distract myself and it’s less severe. My bad thoughts are sometimes there in the background and less loud. I am not far through therapy yet. Is that avoidance by finding hobbies and cleaning to distract myself? I’m constantly checking to see if I’m doing this wrong

Anonymous

Date posted: 25w

Afraid I’ll never be able to stop thinking

My OCD has been terrible the for the past two weeks. I have a fear that I will never be able to get out of the thought loop. I am hyper aware of my thoughts and it disturbs me. I haven’t been able to eat for 10 days. I force myself. I haven’t been able to sleep for more than a couple hours. Then I wake up and ruminate for a couple hours, until I’m exhausted. I’m also afraid I’ll never sleep well again. And I’m afraid I’ll never eat and enjoy my food again. I’m afraid I’ll never be able to stop thinking about this enough to enjoy my family ever again.

"Pure" OCD

Andi 🤓☝️

Date posted: 18w

Anxious

I'm at my college and don't feel like being here. I didn't even want to come here. I woke up with anxiety bc i feel like i need to solve this. I had a bad stomach ache when i arrived to school and still havent even eaten breakfast yet bc i feel like i have to solve this. Im just so worried bc i have harm thoughts daily. If i could i would remove this! I dont want to think anymore. Its just, how do I know i dont have real urges when I'm feeling a negative emotion like anger or disappointment or annoyance? Im worried EVERY time i feel a negative emotion. Yesterday I was playing video games with my neice (we are close in age range) and she made us lose. She started blaming me and I guess i felt a little annoyed, it really wasnt my fault (dumb mini argument it was more playful since we started laughing but it was a bit annoying). Anyway i got a harm thought while feeling annoyed of me getting off the couch and lunging at her to attack. I immediately look at my bodily reaction and I tense up to stay as still as possible. My stomach was hurting and i wanted to leave as fast as possible. I stood up and turned off the game and said i was tired while making sure to stay back from her (and i had my hands away and stiff) but i felt so uneasy. I laid I bed and felt sad and heavy. And i kept getting thoughts that said "íts only a matter of time before you can't take it anymore". I started to reassurance seek using ai to ask if i was about to or if they are real urges or thoughts i mean until i eventually fell asleep in the middle of the compulsion. Im just so worried, what if I act out impulsevly one day? I dont want to! But what if when feeling a negative emotion, i suddenly dont care and do something? I really dont want to! I dont even want to feel negative emotions anymore since they trigger the thoughts and I dont want to think about any of that. As a result i tend to avoid my family as much as possible bc they are annoying sometimes. I just wish i was all alone sometimes so i wont get any more thoughts and so everyone can be safe. I usually just stay in bed under my blankets all day long to avoid my family and pets. I am constantly uncomfortable. I miss when i would never think any of this. Living life has become very scary for me now. 😞

Anonymous

Date posted: 12w

religious OCD

Please help. I have felt so off/wrong all day. I constantly worry that the “bad guy” is going to get me. I have awful thoughts and I constantly want God to know that I don’t mean these thoughts. I am at a point in my therapy where I need to choose to use my ERP but it feels too scary. I then do compulsions, which makes the OCD worse, which makes me want to use ERP less. And the cycle goes on. I am currently sitting in my car crying because I feel so lost and exhausted. I’m not supposed to figure out my thoughts, but today I just went into a spiral of sadness and depression, thinking that I will always feel like this. When my thoughts got really bad at the end of the day, I tried to use ERP even though I was shaking and not believing my responses and I ended up feeling like I missed something and that I gave into the “bad guy.” I have no one to talk when I’m not doing therapy twice a week. I am alone and have no one to talk to when I am like this… please help

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Help! Fear of negative thoughts never going away

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community