I struggle with self harm. My doctor wondered if my thoughts wanting to self harm may be compulsive. I'm not sure how it differs from the depression in that way. Anyone hear of this or experience it?

i also struggle with it and i don't have any symptoms of depression, only GAD and OCD. i feel the urge to do it when i'm frustrated or angry, and in response to obsessive thoughts as an almost automatic response to the pain they cause me. i do feel soothed after i do it. i have also wondered if they are a compulsion, but haven't found answers so far...

Yes I used to struggle with hurting myself. There's an article online that I read talking about ocd and self harm compulsions, but I can't remember the website. When it comes to harm compulsions, in the past I had a voice in my mind tell me to hurt myself repeatedly at times accompanied at other times by images of me doing it and feeling so bad about myself and depressed that after wondering if I was going to, started feeling so bad that I eventually would end up giving in. Do you notice your self harm thoughts are in response to obsessions or thoughts/feelings that occur repeatedly? That's something I've noticed. Another thing I've noticed is I feel like I have to punish myself for a thought I had or something I've just done and if I don't give in, that guilt is something I would battle all day and by battle, I mean even not responding to it and letting it be there the way I would with an obsession but the thought or urge or just feeling like a horrible person and that's why I need to hurt myself might not go away for hours. This has been my experience regarding it. Please see a therapist or psychiatrist if you are in danger of taking your life. I may not know you, but I don't want anything to happen to you. It breaks my heart You're struggling with self-harm. I know that we may feel we deserve to hurt ourselves because that's what our minds tell us, but they're lying. You don't deserve to hurt yourself no matter what thoughts, no matter what you've done, no matter what you feel, and no matter what you've been through. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Is there anything you can do to replace harming yourself that wouldn't be a compulsion? I know that's challenging. I've found we can diffuse those thoughts or feelings of wanting to hurt ourselves with love. First off, God loves you. He sent his only son Jesus to die on the cross for your sins and by believing in him, one day we will go to live with him in heaven. Jesus tore the veil that once kept us separated. He is with you and he loves you so much. Any burdens you have any struggles, we can share anything with him and In my life, his love has helped me to stop hurting myself many times in my life. It breaks his heart when we hurt ourselves because he loves us so much. Please take that in. I don't know what's happened in your life, but he loves you more than anyone could possibly begin to try to because he sent his son to die for you, so you could be saved and live with him forever. That is how much you're worth. Second, have you ever said the words I love you to yourself cause that is what you deserve. We deal with so much pain in this life and so often we internalize it and may start to hate ourselves and hurt ourselves as a result. Ocd's guilt is unrelenting, but we don't have to treat ourselves the way ocd does. Is there a part of you that's hurting?You don't deserve to hurt yourself more than you already are or to hurt yourself at all. What would it be like to say to yourself that you are here for you, to give that love to yourself you want? Maybe that sounds too hard. In that case, take baby steps. I didn't think it would ever be possible to get to this place, but It's absolutely possible and worth it. Lastly, there's an app called calm harm. I'm not sure if it could help you in some way. I hope you feel better soon and something I said can help you. You are not alone. You are loved and you are needed in this world. ❤️ God bless you. If there's any other questions you have or you just need someone to talk to, I am here and I'll try to respond as quickly as I can.