Parenting and maintenance of OCD are both very much full time for me right now. I know parenting never changes and is always a full time job but I really am feeling frustrated at OCD and of having to constantly navigate this monsterous debilitation that reares it's ugly head every so often. I have to get my balance better.
I just could not have described it any better than that šÆ. Itās an amazing balancing act indeed. Itās kind of like that arcade game where the gopher pops up and you whack it back down with the padded mallet thingy. Ocd, donāt you make me get the mallet, you know whatās up!!!š¤£š¤£. Hopefully that brings a little laughter in your day. Sometimes, what the hell else can you do?!?! But how awesome that laughter can lower ocdās sailsš.
I am so grateful for that comment. Yes. That mallet
Laughter is pretty necessary. And crying šš
@Thornhill Iām thankful for you sharing what your working through, itās so good to know Iām not the only one. So glad to know i could give you that imagery to carry with you when things get tough, awesome!!! I hope the rest of your day is just good good stuff.
@Someonemaybe I feel like the mallet is a permanent fixture right now. Need a slingshot to hit it right in the eyes
@Thornhill Thatās whatās up lol, i love using my slingshot. But yes, the mallet analogy seems so fitting because no matter your progression, life always has a test for you straight away. But itās those tests that reveal your strengths and weaknesses. And the best way to combat weaknesses is the same as an enemy, know them well, like a close friend, and learn what brings it down so you can continue being you, without the bsocd trying to steal your happiness. bsocd is bulls**t ocd type thoughts, in case the acronym didnāt make sense lol. So keep that thing handy and pounce the negativity down as fast as it rears its ugly head. My life is like Newtonās third law of motion, for every action, there is an equal but opposite reaction. For every good thing that occurs in my life, itās met with difficulty following close behind. So i hope for the best and expect the worst. The worst will happen, but Iām prepared to respond rather than react. We will screw up, but itās what we do after that which defines us. You communicating with your kids when youāre struggling, makes all the difference for them, and you. Thatās beautiful that you do that as well, it means so much to themš„¹. I love the socks analogy, never heard that before and itās so true lol. Isnāt it amazing how much they teach us, when we thought we would teach them so much lol. Itās an awesome thing indeed.
@Thornhill ā¦and crying, yes, so true. Man or women it doesnāt matter, you gotta let those emotions breathe or theyāll suffocate youšÆ%!
I conqueror and then I fall a little ways, but I learn and I build it up again. I learn from every moment it's like this. Its weird how almost worrisome it feels when I'm handling it all better and OCD isn't just all up in my face so maybe I asked for it lol NOPE! Just like stocks, there's ups and downs but you don't always fall so far. You are never at the beginning again. That's a blessing. My kids are amazing and I try to be up front with them when my brain is a bit off.
Please if someone can reply! I really just need someone to talk to. I donāt even know how to control my OCD. It honestly feels like itās controlling me. Everyday my mind focuses on every bodily sensation I have and itās like a broken record player, I have horrible health anxiety and my OCD just makes it worst just thinking about it everyday. It feels like everyone who I explain it to looks at me like Iām stupid/crazy. I use to be much more tame with my OCD, I use to eat things without worry, now I canāt even touch things I use to eat without worrying that Iāll get an allergic reaction (despite eating them BEFORE,,,but my mind tells me otherwise) and omg worrying about heart attacks, pulmonary issues..and I couldnāt even enjoy my own childās birth because my mind was on high alert thinking I would hemorrhage any second or develop pre-E (complications of postpartum) I was miserable for the first couple of months of my babyās life and I didnāt know what to do. And now, Iām pregnant with my second (4wks) and all the OCD thoughts and anxiety is coming back at me and I have no one to talk to, I feel lonely. And even if I considered taking a pill, Iād worry about being allergic to it and refusing to take it. I ruin everything for everyone. I remember I ate out one night and I started to think āyouāre gonna pass out! Youāre gonna pass out! (Without ever passing out before) and I had to leave! I feel like I ruin the mood for everyone when I donāt even try to, and I hate it.
My ocd kicks in so strong this tine of year. My teaching job ends for two months and my ocd moves in to make me miserable. I can and will get through this but it sucks so bad right now! In therapy but still itās kicking my ass. Any thing besides just sitting with it??? Itās definitely in the drivers seat and I donāt like the way itās driving! Also itās exhausting
Life has been so tough for me lately. Iāve been stuck in an OCD spiral since last December. Most of my fears come from incidentally causing harm to my family or others. I feel like every action is a moral conflict, or that any time I make a bad decision, act out of frustration, or self indulge in anything, Iām debating about whether Iām an awful person who doesnāt care about my kids, my wife, or other people. Iām a stay at home parent currently, and all three of my kids are neurodivergent, with my youngest being on the spectrum. My youngest is nonverbal, so my OCD loves to manipulate that, making it hard to know if my son is happy, sad, upset, etc. Always feeling like Iām worried Iāll make too many mistakes as a parent. That any time I lose my cool, it means Iām just this awful person and parent. Iām burnt out from the stress currently, so I always feel on edge, which makes it harder to have the mental power to resist compulsions. I am in OCD therapy, which has helped. But every time I feel like Iām taking steps in the right direction I get sucked back in. Every time I resist compulsions, Iām triggered almost immediately after. Because Iām a stay at home parent, and a lot of my triggers and themes involve harm to others, particularly my family, itās just trigger after trigger after trigger. My wife is exhausted from my mental health, which just adds to the guilt I already feel. I hate that my mental health is affecting everyone, and it only reinforces the idea that Iām causing harm or suffering to those around me. I just need a break. I cannot keep living my life this way. This is the worst my OCD has been, and I feel so traumatized from all the days and hours Iāve spent feeling like Iām at my limit. Thanks for reading. Feel free to respond if you can relate. Just needed to vent.
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