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I dealt with this growing up, not knowing I had OCD. I had thoughts about hating God, having Satan in me, even thoughts of maybe loving Satan! I compulsively prayed because I hated those thoughts and I was told that thoughts meant everything. Here’s a reminder I wished someone would have told me- Thoughts do not define you. God knows YOU. He knows you have OCD. He loves YOU regardless of your intrusive thoughts. God is greater than our brains give him credit for. He is not ashamed of you! You are his child and he knows you and loves you. I truly understand and have felt the hurt that OCD can put on your heart when it comes to religion and beliefs. It’s heavy but you can overcome it! You got this. Hope this helps you breathe a little easier!

Hi. Yes, this is all pretty common with us as Christians that have OCD (scrupulosity). I wrote a book you may find helpful - "Waging War Against OCD - A Christian Approach to Victory." One thing to remember is that OCD attacks what is most valuable to us - so the experiences you describe are actually evidence that you believe and don't want to dishonor God.

OCD attaches itself to who and what you value and what you fear. This is probably the reason why you're experiencing scrupulosity OCD. I've gone through the same theme. I believe that God knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows these thoughts are coming from OCD, and are not a reflection of your true feelings. In your morning prayers, why not tell Him that you're sorry for any negative thoughts you may have about Him throughout the day, and that you intend to treat them with indifference, so that they'll dissipate. With OCD, it's not the content, but how we react to it, that matters. As in all OCD thoughts and feelings, if you don't react to them, they begin to fade away. It takes practice, but I have learned that it works. BTW, are you in therapy with a trained OCD therapist who uses ERP therapy? NOCD has some trained therapists who are also Christian counselors. I recommend Judy Lair. Hope this helps.

What KaraClouds said is spot on! I’ve dealt with the exact same thing. You’re not alone in this!