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God knows you have ocd. He knows you arent your thoughts. Its hard to go through but God understands and loves you. He created you. You don't need to bang your head, he doesnt want you too.

He knows who you are and knows your heart. Yes, He KNOWS you have OCD and is so passionately trying to heal you and comfort you. Intrusive thoughts are just that: intrusive. So don’t think your character is made up of these thoughts. You are so much more than what OCD makes you think and I am assured that God thinks you’re wonderful and delights in YOU! In all your struggles and He wants you to not hurt yourself and He wants you to be gentle with yourself like He is with you! Try not to hit your head, and KNOW THAT GOD LOVES YOU!! No matter what know that God loves you!!! That makes all the difference!! I am praying for you!