Anyone have any advice for dating with OCD? Specifically the more taboo themes like POCD, incest ocd zoophilia ocd, harm ocd etc. I’ve never really dated in my life and the thought of approaching these conversations with people not in the ocd community is kind of scary
Hi! I deal with the same subtypes of ocd that your dealing with, I'm currently in a relationship (almost 4 years) and the symptoms of my ocd have always been there(more of a just right) but were never too bad until they reached pocd and I started to panic, my boyfriend knows all about the thoughts I have, and the mental illness that is causing it(confessing is a compultion of mine that I'm working on), dating with ocd is absolutely possible its just about finding the person who understands you for you, don't be discouraged, I'm sure there someone out there who will understand that you have ocd and that your thoughts are in fact just thoughts and that they are not yours and are caused by ocd, I wish you luck on your healing journey! I hope everything works out well!
Hello! I would say to take it slowly and give yourself grace. I have some similar obsessions and whenever I push myself to date it causes my obsessions to flair up. I used to feel like I either needed to be “normal” with a partner or that I had to talk about these difficult topics with them until they understood me completely. I would often get discouraged because of how extreme my expectations were. You should feel safe with your partner and they with you. That kinda relationship takes time. Whatever you end up deciding, you got this!
Well I'm in a relationship right now and I don't really tell my partner about it. He knows that I have ocd and I also believe that once I told him that I have intrusive thougths but without any details, just that I have them. He just saaaaid that he understands bc he haas them too sometimes. Sometimes I wish he knew a bit more or was at least interested in knowing more but I believe it's better that way. I believe that it's my health issue and as far as he can know that I have an issue it doesn't mean that he has to know it all. I still have to get better by myself and sharing more might turn into a compulsion and might just be too heavy for him to handle.
And not too heavy bc there is something wrong with haaaving ocd like that. I just don't like when people know what I'm struggling with and get worried when I'm absolutly handling it
This is the one topic I don’t find much discussion about online, and I’m wondering how many of you have experienced this. Have any of you been prevented from engaging in intimate acts by your OCD? Has your OCD affected intimacy between you and your partner/s? I’m discovering that this is very much the case for me, and I know it’s probably the same for lots of folks out there!
So I’m really struggling to believe that anyone will want to be in a relationship with me and still love me when they find out about my pocd and intrusive thoughts. I am holding a belief no one can love me with this condition and they will be repulsed by me when they find out. I just don’t know how to shake that feeling and be brave enough to try and share with anyone I’m dating.
At this point of my life I barely have compulsions, barely let them control me, but recently I have realised my OCD is still keeping itself alive by holding me back and making me avoid stuff since I cut compulsions. So I don’t do compulsions but I avoid. And when it comes to SO OCD, I avoid dating. I am in the age where it’s the most common thing to do, I have friends who are getting married and I still haven’t seriously dated my entire life. If I date I date to marry. But it’s making it even harder. My brain tells me I can’t date to marry or date at all because no man will accept the possibility that I am bisexual or the fact I might have intrusive thoughts over sexuality. Worse than that, what’s actually holding me back is the fact that in one of our dates I know I’ll have to bring this up. And what if the man will start to get stressed over it? What if it’ll be too much for him and he’ll leave? And worse-tell the people that know both me and him all the personal things I told him about me having SO OCD? I can’t do this.. I don’t want to do this to myself I don’t want to let go of this secret to any man who can just leave me because of it at any point.. that’s what’s holding me back from dating.. and I want to be brave, I want to just go for it, I want to let it go but am too afraid I am just selling myself and my darkest secrets out there for men who can cancel me at any moment. I gave up on dating… it’s all too complicated for me and I have this voice in the back of my head telling me maybe I wasn’t born for it. Maybe I wasn’t born to get married or be in a relationship, maybe I am not good enough for all of this.. and then OCD adds its own stuff.. maybe I am gay and dating would be lying to myself and the men I date.. too much responsibility..
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