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@jesus.is.freedom Let's talk about this and work through this. I think I can help you. This is VERY common. I have had those sort of thoughts myself. There is a way out of this!!!!! I'm at the park right now, but when I get home, I'll try to get on my computer and type out how to treat this is. It is treatable!!! You can conquer this!!! You are SAFE , even though you don't feel safe.

@jesus.is.freedom Can I ask you a few questions? Do you have any compulsions ? These would be the safety behaviors that you would do after the thoughts in order for to protect yourself or keep yourself safe? These could be either mental or physical.

@jesus.is.freedom I'm not as familiar with thought/ action fusion. Can you explain how that works in your case? That would really help me understand better. Also, you have done ERP therapy?

@jesus.is.freedom Okay, yes! I have had this before too! I would get an intrusive thought and think that whatever I was thinking about also at the same time would be fused. So, for example, if I was thinking about chocolate at the same time that I had the intrusive thought, I thought that I couldn't eat chocolate for a day or it would make the thought somehow true. I didn't know that was called action fusion. That's good to know. Awesome that you are doing ERP for it! It is awesome treatment for this

@jesus.is.freedom So can I ask why your body is tense? Are you afraid of certain movements related to the thoughts?

@Tea and Honey Also, I want to ask what is your belief about the intrusive thoughts? Do you believe that they mean NOTHING and that you can let them run freely through your head without fixing them?

@Tea and Honey I can get on the computer now. But I want to make sure I understand. :):) I really believe that the thoughts mean nothing, and that has really helped me. But if I didn't think that, life would be a lot more complicated. So just checking what is your approach to the intrusive thoughts, if you don't mind my asking? :):):) I think I might be able to help you :)

@jesus.is.freedom - Sounds like you are on the path to getting better. :). OCD can be a long journey. Sometimes we get better a little bit at a time. I first started to recover from OCD when I sincerely prayed about it, and it was a very slow process. I got a little better day by day for years. That was maybe 19 years ago? And I am still on the pathway. I haven't fully arrived, but I am wayyyyyyyyyyy better than I was at the beginning. I remember, many years ago, coming to the realization that I should let the thoughts run freely through my mind. I needed to stop fighting them off or fixing them. You see, I used to have terrible thoughts in my head toward God, and I was scared to let them run free. But I decided to "let them run" simply out of faith. It was the best decision I could have made. Now, when I am on this app, I really try to help other people change their relationship with the intrusive thoughts. Half of the OCD battle is coming to the realization that we don't have to "fight" off the thoughts. And we don't have to "fix" them. We need to just allow the thoughts to be there, even if they are awful. We are safe to do that, because the thoughts actually mean nothing. I am going to copy and paste something that I was shared with a lot of people on this app. Let me know if it helps you. :)

@jesus.is.freedom - The key is to STOP fighting off the thoughts. You need to just accept that they are in your head, and that they are MEANINGLESS—so it doesn’t matter if they are there or not. —————— Don’t ever fight the thoughts. This is very important for OCD recovery. ERP therapy trains us to never fight the thoughts. If you try to fight them off, they’re just going to get worse. My therapist explained it like this: Imagine a tree planted by river. The leaves from the tree fall off and float down the river. You watch the leaves fall, but you don’t try to stop them. You just let them float down the river. This is the same with ALL intrusive thoughts. It doesn’t matter if these are bad thoughts about God, violence, sex, attractions, etc. All intrusive thoughts are the SAME. You just let them fall off the tree and float down the river. Here’s another analogy: Imagine a swarm of angry bees around someone’s head. The bees can’t really bite or sting, but they are very annoying as they swarm around the person’s head. They’re not really harmful to the person, but they are disturbing just because they are there. This is the same thing as the intrusive thoughts. They can’t really harm anything, and they don’t have any real power. But they are distracting and disturbing because they are there. If you take a stick and try to fight them off, they’re just going to swarm around even worse and get even stronger. It doesn’t work to try to fight them off with a stick. They will always keep swarming. In the same way, we can’t fight off the intrusive thoughts. It’s impossible. Besides, the thoughts are meaningless, and they can’t hurt us anyway. So don’t try to fight them off. Here’s one more analogy: Imagine your little brother is always saying mean things to you. Sometimes he shout means things; sometimes he whispers mean things; sometimes he shows you ugly pictures that he has drawn. He’s always trying to tease you and always trying to get you upset, and he’s always saying horrible things to you. If you shout at him to stop doing it, he’s just going to do it more. You have to accept that you can’t stop what he says. But if you ignore him and don’t give him any response and don’t get upset , he will eventually get bored and stop trying so hard. It’s the same with the intrusive thoughts. You can’t stop them. But if you get upset every time they come into your head, you are giving them power. You OCD (like a little brother) is going to feed you more of the things that “rile you up.” But if you don’t get upset and don’t care if these things are coming into your brain, then you can go about your life as normal. In this way, you are showing that these thoughts really have no power over you. Your OCD will try to trick you into giving “meaning” to the thoughts by saying maybe you will like them or maybe you will accept them, blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah. Don’t listen to the OCD. Practice strict ERP no matter how you feel and no matter how the OCD tries to tell you the danger you’re in if you start ignoring the thoughts. The truth is the thoughts don’t mean anything, so you can ignore them. You can’t make them go away (like the bees), but you can give them no power by acknowledging that they are meaningless.

@jesus.is.freedom No. I have been living by this principle for years. And God has shown up big time in my life. I know he's with me. I really believe that it is safe to let the thoughts run freely. When we do this, it takes the fear and pressure away. In fact, the more we fight the thoughts, the worse they get. But if you allow the thoughts, then they lose all their power over you (because you are no longer trying to fight them or fix them). This is the best way to defeat the OCD. It is scary to let the thoughts run. That is why a Christian needs to take a hold of God's hand and take that step OUT OF FAITH. We need to believe God more than we believe the OCD.