Anonymous
- Date posted
- 6w
ROCD struggles
Really struggling with my ROCD lately. I see anyone attractive and it immediately triggers doubt thoughts. Idk if this ever ends or you just learn to deal with it?
KdmawKdmaw
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 6w
I think it doesn’t end but it also doesn’t have to be dealt with forever. Like, as you deal with it, it becomes less of an issue to have to deal with, but it’s not ended per se. If the doubt is on you in your relationship as opposed to your partner or the relationship itself (I.e. being attracted to others makes you doubt yourself in the relationship), then there’s also the front on whether being attracted to others is itself a bad idea. I realized after being in a long term relationship that I was polyamorous. I chose to maintain that monogamous relationship, but I stopped judging myself and others for not having some specific set of inner feelings about how a person should feel about such things
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6w
@Kdmaw Yea it's certainly a struggle. I'm quite sure these thoughts would happen with anyone I was with. It's just like your mind getting used to one thing but becoming curious in another. However this a commitment and I need to remember that
Helpme55Helpme55
- Date posted
- 6w
@Kdmaw Did you stay in your long term relationship? If so, how did you work things out with your partner!
KdmawKdmaw
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 6w
@Helpme55 Yeah still going strong - we’re in our 24th year together now. I practice monogamy even though I’m polyamorous. It’s a choice I make consciously now, but I have the agency to make that choice for myself. I don’t just accept monogamy as the only good choice that I have to follow, which is what it was for me when I was younger. That reframing of my perspective helped me learn to not beat myself up when I’m attracted to others or develop emotional connection to others. I just make a concerted effort not to have overly intimate relationships with others that cross relationship boundaries. I see it like, you can give up eating peanuts even if you love them because your partner has a severe allergy to them.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6w
@Kdmaw That's good to hear and encouraging!
Related posts
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 25w
ROCD
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 22w
ROCD
I keep seeing random people that are "more" attractive than my gf and it just makes me question everything. I will then go through photos of my gf to validate my relationship. This just sucks. Maybe I am with the wrong person?
Mk3
- Date posted
- 14w
ROCD
I am in an endless battle to figure things out. I think I figure something out that makes me feel better about my thoughts and then I find something else to prove it wrong and the cycle continues. I have so much discomfort I want to confess to my partner so bad. How do I handle this. I don’t think I’ve ever sat in this much discomfort. Why does it feel THIS BAD.
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