Meta-narrative (?) Fear/OCD/doubt about ERP

One place where my OCD tends to crop up is around contamination (ie ways that I believe I am endangering my family, whether exposing them to danger or whether I am the danger myself). But sometimes I feel that my fears are totally justified and that ERP is just trying to gaslight my brain into forgetting my responsibility to keep them safe. I don’t really believe in ERP right now and I don’t see why I should. Truthfully, I’ve never seen why I should. I don’t want to be calm. At least, that’s not my priority. I want my family to be safe, and if they’re not, then why should I be calm about that? Being at peace should be a by-product of having done my best to protect them. Maybe I can “live with” the possibility of something external happening if I’ve done what I can to protect them, but if I’m not doing that, then I have no right to be at peace. Does anyone else feel this way, and how do you answer yourself? I’m feeling angry and disillusioned about what ERP is trying to accomplish. I’m feeling like it’s setting up a false peace in my mind that doesn’t match the truth that my fear is trying to make me understand. I have heard my therapist say that I need to work the process if I want it to work, but I am not even sold on whether the promised result is worth pursuing. Please help if you can.

Love yourself

Date posted: 8w

Absolutely. I feel the exact same way at times, couldn’t have said it better. “When you find yourself stuck in your convictions, it’s time to realize that you aren’t using the tool that is your mind, it’s using you”. OCD is persistent and rigid. It is determined. It will always feel like the only way. I had lots of guilt from OCD, and was convinced that I needed to go to jail. ERP felt ridiculous, like an out for what I really deserved. But you have to understand on a very practical level that you have a condition that makes emotions feel like fact. You’ll be beside yourself, feeling like “this can’t be right, I feel ‘x’!” That stubborness, that feel of absolute 100% certainty is what OCD is searching for. you feel you can get that by going to the most extreme case, such as lets say washing your hands compulsively before going near your family. “Now they for sure can’t sick, right?” but it’s never enough. You’re chasing a certainty that will never come. You’ll always feel one thought away from figuring it all out, but you never are. ERP destroys the illusion that certainty will solve all of your problems. So that feeling of, “It’s telling me I shouldn’t keep my family safe??” Is OCD trying to drag you back into its vicious cycle. If you’re worried, ask a doctor what the normal precautions are and don’t go beyond that. When you feel the need to, that’s when to remember ERP

Dude01

Date posted: 2d

I have a lot more confidence that ERP can work for you than for Real Event OCD. There is a level of risk in literally everything. You can only do what's within your control. Also the level of risk from contamination to do any serious damage is so minuscule that's it's basically negligible.

Tea and Honey

Date posted: 23w

Summary of recovery through ERP

I had just posted a summary of ERP for a group member, and I thought it might be useful for everybody. Here it is below (with a little extra added)…. ERP therapy is researched-based. Most other therapies don’t work. There have been people who have been literally stuck in their houses (from their OCD) who gained their lives back through ERP therapy. NOCD does ERP therapy exclusively. You can find it in other places too, but you have to ask around. There are two tenants of ERP therapy: The first one has to do with the repetitive thoughts inside our heads. These thoughts are actually defined as “obsessions”. You are not supposed to do anything with the obsessions. You are supposed to let them run through your head freely, without trying to fix them or stop them. Imagine a tree planted by a river. The leaves fall off and float down the river. You can see the leaves falling, but you don’t try to stop them or pick them up. You don’t try to fix them. You just let them float away. This is really important to do with your obsessive thoughts. The more you try to fight them off, the worse they get. I used to have blasphemous sentences running in my head 24/7. I felt like I had to put a “not” next to each sentence in order to “fix” it. But this just took hours of my time every day, and it was very scary, because I was worried that if I messed up, that I would go to hell. It was very freeing to learn later that I could just let those sentences run freely through my head without trying to fix them. The second part of ERP therapy is all about “denying your compulsions.” Every time OCD tells you that if you don’t do things a certain way that something really bad will happen, that is a compulsion. Once you recognize what your compulsions are, ERP therapy will have you practice stopping doing all of those things. For some people, that will mean stopping washing their hands or touching lights switches or, in my case, putting “fixing” words in their head. Compulsions are safety behaviors. During ERP therapy, you will practice stopping engaging with safety behaviors. All this is very hard to do and scary, so during therapy you will be given tools to help you deal with the fear. Often ERP therapy will take people from being non-functional to functional. I highly recommend it. ————————————————- PITFALL #1: After you have been doing ERP for a while and become somewhat successful, the OCD will try subtle little tricks to bring you down again. The first one is to tell you that your thoughts are REAL and not OCD, and therefore you can’t apply ERP therapy. Don’t fall for this trick! All thoughts are just thoughts. They are all meaningless. Don’t try to figure out what is real and what is OCD. Just treat all thoughts with ERP therapy. PITFALL #2: The second pitfall is that OCD will tell you that you can’t move forward unless you have absolute certainty that you will be safe. Hate to tell you this, folks, but there is no certainty in life. You will never know for SURE that you or your loved ones will be “safe” from the OCD rules. Therefore, you have to move forward in the uncertainty. It’s hard, but it gets easier with time and practice. We got this, guys !!!!!!

TrustGod24

Date posted: 22w

ERP

I’m thinking about doing erp but my ocd is so severe the thought of accepting my fears happening to me makes me sick to my stomach. I also believe in the power of my words and saying I accept this Bad thing will attract it into my life. I’m not sure what I should do🥲

hbocd

Date posted: 21w

ERP Therapy

I read about ERP and have seen information about it on here. One of the goals is to say, "maybe I am this or that...ect." That terrified me. The thoughts and images that go in my head are disturbing and upsetting. I don't want to even think about saying, "maybe this or that." It's devasting to have these thoughts and question why you're having these thoughts. Doesn't the "maybe" make it worse? The one thing that helps me is that is to remind myself that these are just thoughts and I know I'm not a monster, even if I feel like one. Is ERP not for everyone? Has anyone else had a problem with the techniques used in this kind of therapy? I had cognitive therapy for years with an OCD specialist and that seemed to help a lot. Writing out the worst case scenarios would make me suicidal. Im having a difficult time not obsessing over the "maybe" after intrusive thoughts now. It doesn't make it better.

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Meta-narrative (?) Fear/OCD/doubt about ERP

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