Anybody else struggle with anger issues and OCD?

I notice that I tend to get angry or irritated extremely easy in comparison to other people. I have a lot of trouble when it comes to emotional regulation, which leaves me with chronic guilt and regret. I have moments where I say things out of anger, and then regret them later. I don’t outwardly road rage, but I still do things that could potentially set somebody off (like letting off the gas when somebody’s tailgating me and then riding next to a car so they can’t get back over) and I constantly feel bad about them, but somehow end up repeating the same mistake. I don’t know why I get so angry and upset and then am so quick to feel guilty, only to make the same mistake again. I’m know I’m not an angry person, so I don’t know why I feel so angry all of the time or why I’ve been this way for so long.

Lindalu66

Date posted: 15w

My anger creeps up on me- I feel my heart pounding and then I’m talking very forcefully. Like the anger takes over my body and mind. Then I realize the body language I use to be heard. It’s not good communication for sure. Then the guilt & shame. I learn from all that and feel bad too. I’m older so I’ve had this a long time. Maybe a survival mechanism to be heard. I’ve always been an introvert so I hurt inside. Feels good to share-

An0nym0us26748

Date posted: 15w

@Lindalu66 I feel the same way. I see some of my friends be completely calm about something that I know would irritate me, and it makes me feel like something is wrong with me. I’m sorry that you’re hurting☹️Thank you for sharing and I wish you the best, just know you’re not alone.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15w

Thanks for posting this! I haven't seen many ppl talk about this but I can relate... I've had anger issues off an on my whole life that I didn't really understand it until I got diagnosed with OCD. I think a part of my anger is normal/ healthy but at some point when it's increasing it feels like it's acting as a compulsion. It's hard to explain but I can even pinpoint when it's moving into compulsion territory. It feels like it's harder to control and defensive and high adrenaline. I use it as a signal to my myself now that I'm in a compulsive state and to change course. To change course, I have to try to recognize what scenario the anger is resisting, then "maybe, maybe not" + "it's not healthy for you to try to control this" it or try different phrases until I can move the anger to give up and let me feel sadness (sometimes fear first) and then feel sadness for as long as it exists (not try to stop it). I'm not sure if this is similar to what you're experiencing but I hope you find something that works for you.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15w

The anger felt more tolerable than the distress when I give up in the beginning... this is why I think it's related to compulsions. I think it was protective against that distress.

An0nym0us26748

Date posted: 15w

@Anonymous Yeah I totally agree! I really do wish more people talked about it because at times it makes me feel a bit alone. It gets so hard trying to calm yourself down in the moment, even if a part of you knows how you feel is a bit irrational. I tend to just withdraw myself, but sometimes I still act out. I’m definitely trying to work on it, but for some reason, I’ve just been so agitated lately. I’ll definitely try your method and thank you so much for responding!

Anonymous

Date posted: 14w

@Unknown1738 I feel you. It's tough. I struggle to calm myself down too. I have to be really specific in how i do it. I wonder if the mind perceives some calming methods as it being dismissed and that's why it holds it ground? Like when I'm angry I want something to change and with some calming methods I'm saying I can't have the change and I can't feel how I feel... makes sense this would make me angrier. If you come across other methods ... or methods that make allowing the angry mind to feel safe to give up feel free to post them here. I can do the same.

An0nym0us26748

Date posted: 14w

@Anonymous Sorry, I am just now seeing this! But yes I feel the exact same way. I’m still trying to find methods that work for me, some days it’s harder than others, but if I find something, I’ll be sure to come back and let you know. Thank you and I wish you the best, and I hope you’re doing well!

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