Paranoia-themed Intrusive Thoughts

For the last year or so (10 months) I have had an obsession with developing schizophrenia after learning about prodrome from a Twitter comment section. I have a history of health OCD going back seven years with everything from balding, Lyme, MS, stroke, and rabies being themes. This obsession with schizophrenia has led me to have intrusive thoughts and compulsions around checking to see if I'm hallucinating, checking to see if I believe conspiracy theories, checking to see if I'm paranoid or mistrustful, and checking to see if I have memory issues/dissociation. Steadily with ERP many of these have been chipped away but I had to move recently and cease treatment for the time being until I can find a new therapist in my area. I'm now stuck in a loop trying to find out if I'm paranoid, checking in with my mind constantly to see if I'm afraid of being watched/tracked/etc.; I frequently get these intrusive thoughts now and I'm really scared that they mean I'm developing psychosis and I don't know what to do to deal with them. I've been able to do exposures for memory/dissociation/hallucinations and I don't really worry about those anymore, but this paranoia thing is so sticky I'm not sure what kind of exposures would work. I'm already on Zoloft 100mg and am not sure how to get this feeling to go away with ERP. Has anyone had experience with treating this theme? Thank you so much for your support

Health Concern OCD

ScuderiaAlpha

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4d

Believe it or not this theme is actually very common as are the thoughts that go with it. Yes even the ones that deal with “Am I paranoid/mistrustful/having delusions?” or even just sending you some “delusional” intrusive thoughts. OCD really says anything it needs to in order to get a reaction and some compulsions out of you. Because you know that these are the type of thoughts that only someone with Schizophrenia would get, OCD says “ah I bet this will do the trick”. And because OCD always feels like it’s 100% real it can be very distressing to get these kind of thoughts because OCD says “only someone with Schizophrenia would EVER have these thoughts!”. My advice would be to treat these like you did with the hallucinations, conspiracy theory based intrusive thoughts. They’re really no different even though your brain might say “no no these ones I really can’t deal with”. My advice would be to just treat these exactly the same. “Yeah that’s a good one, maybe I am delusional maybe I’m not, who knows” are non-engagement responses I like to use. Just remember, even though OCD might try and tell you these are different, they’re really not.

keatonbhoy

Date posted: 17h

@ScuderiaAlpha One question on exposures- sometimes I think I get exposures and compulsions mixed up; I think that exposing myself to the idea of a particularly scary delusional worldview or self-understanding and then not "compulsing" (attempting to determine whether I believe/will believe said worldview) will be helpful, but then I become afraid that by even imagining such a worldview, made accessible by imagining it, may become convincing to me, and then I think I'm compulsing by trying to defuse or disprove it within the exposure. It feels as though the exposure itself is dangerous (which maybe it ought to) but I'm not sure how to not try and negotiate with it on my own. These aren't intrusive thoughts in the organic sense that I'm trying to habituate to - they are rather elaborate feared selves that haunt me, that I compulsively think if I could "predict" or imagine in full I could protect myself from becoming that self. The problem is the compulsion of imagining this self itself feels dangerous - if I'm understanding ERP correctly, shouldn't I be attempting to accept that becoming a feared self could actually result from my simply imagining what that feared self would think/believe? Sorry for the complicated question! I just want to make sure I'm targeting the right point in the compulsive cycle. Something like "If I construct in my imagination a conspiratorial, paranoid worldview to check if I believe it, I will inadvertently cause myself to believe in that worldview and become unrecognizable."

Anonymous

Date posted: 20w

Solipsism/existential OCD, ERP therapy ideas?

Suffering from solipsism ocd where I think that everything around me is fake and that I’m stuck in a simulation as the only conscious being. I also have thoughts that there is a higher power that is controlling everything around me and that I’m the main character in a video game. Everyone and everything around me is an npc or generated to keep me in the “game”. This is the worst ocd theme that I’ve had to deal with thus far. Is there anybody else that has had this? and what ERP techniques can I use? Need some ideas. Thanks.

Anonymous

Date posted: 19w

Is schizo ocd a thing?

I have been having these fears about developing schizophrenia, it reached a point where i am starting to almost hear things or the smallest sounds and my mind tells me you're schizophrenic, and i feel this weird sensations in my ear as if someone is whispering yet i can barely hear them, the thing is i am not diagnosed yet because i never work with an OCD therapist but i study psychology so i just used what i learnt to give a meaning to my suffering, many themes of this fear have been happening before and this schizophrenia fear is the last one. I want to know what advice you can give me or ways to make my brain calm down a little bit, i also don't have and can't afford a therapist that's why i am here in the first place I also want to know more informations or experiences with this theme if anyone habe experienced it and what helped you with it I remember feeling better for a while but than i collapsed back, but i am hoping to get better soon too or anytime in the future, I don't want reassurance so make sure you be as real as you can, and thanks 🙏🏻

cait1299

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 15w

Really struggling!

Hi guys! I had really bad harm ocd about 2 years ago and I went through therapy and eventually got really good at handling it when it would pop up. The other day, I was scrolling on TikTok and came across a girl talking about a guy who was presenting a lot of schizophrenic symptoms but no one paid attention and got him help, he was having a lot of delusions, hallucinating, thinking everyone was out to get him, thought he was Jesus and his dad was the president and ended up doing horrific things. The day after that, I was dealing with some work drama and had the thought of “what if all my coworkers are against me and trying to get me fired”. That really stressed me out, cause I don’t normally think about them like that and I went down a rabbit hole of thinking that was the beginning of me developing schizophrenia, ended up googling stuff all night, taking tests, crying and seeking reassurance. I had a thought the other day “your dad is the president”, this one didn’t stress me out as bad as I knew it was just the video I had seen and it was an intrusive thought about it, and I also didn’t believe it. Today I was with some friends and I got a prize at a place we went and it said “lonely” on it. I do have my moments of feeling lonely and this week has been specifically trying so I had a thought like “oh someone’s out to get me cause I got this”. I know this isn’t logical and it wouldn’t make sense to just randomly get it if someone was truly after me and it was just a stupid prize at a random place, anyone could’ve gotten it. Im just struggling a lot with schizophrenic OCD and thinking I’m in the pre stages of it. In my good moments, I don’t think I am at all and it was all just sparked from the video I watched but in my bad moments, these thoughts feel real!! They really stress me out and make me feel like I’m going to lose my mind causing me to lose my job/ end up in a psych hospital/ never live a normal life/ end up alone, never see me my loved ones/ hurt my loved ones. I just want to feel normal and not like I’m about to lose my mind and everything I care about. Please help!!! Anyone else going through something similar and can help me get through this!

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Paranoia-themed Intrusive Thoughts

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community