derm/trichotillomania help pls!!!

First off - I’m sorry, I post here a lot. My thoughts are going to be scattered because I have the adhd/ocd/executive dysfunction wombo combo. Im so embarrassed I am THIS neurodivergent. I swear my brain couldn’t pick one struggle and settle with it. I’m not making these diagnoses quirky personality traits by any means, in fact, in this post im venting about how exhausting and embarassed I am living with a brain like this on the daily. I need to hear someone’s advice please. I love hearing everyone’s advice on posts because it’s so useful, and brings me back down to reality. Everyone on here gives advice so tastefully in a way where it doesn’t feed into the self reassurance compulsion, but it’s also been thorough and constructive enough where it’s reminded me to ground myself in a healthy way. I love seeing others helping others, it soothes me. This community has been so kind, and I’m so happy I found it. I wish I could ask more, but I have so many questions I think it’d drive everyone here crazy lol. I am doing erp therapy now, and it’s been teaching me so many amazing techniques. I’ve been making progress. However, I sometimes have my moments of vunerablity. I’ve been experiencing this especially now more than ever because I am going through a breakup. He did it through text after nearly 9 months together. I’d do anything for him and love him through anything, and he broke my heart when I least expected it. I’d make his bed for him multiple times, but I haven’t done that for myself in years. I’d sit with him for hours to watch and do anything he likes, but he’d never do the same and I’d never do the same for me. I’m also at fault because I was too scared to speak up so I let a lot of disrespect slide. Why did my ocd do that? Why does ocd make me people please even when I don’t want to? Why does OCD make me care so much about things that will never effect me (like wanting validation from a random person on the street and hoping they’ll think I’m pretty enough to look at), but then when it comes to my future or positive wellbeing (like focusing on college/doing well in classes/personal hygiene/health), forces me to not care/neglect myself and those needs? I don’t understand it. Ocd makes me think everything’s a setup or a trap. I can never believe that I am fine right where I want to be. Why am I so hard on myself? Why do I even think this much? I care and feel so deeply but it becomes unhealthy so fast because ocd makes me fixate and I stay there for a while. For some reason I let this breakup define my self worth. I let it topple into the ocd fear that I will never make it in life - that I won’t be successful, I’ll never get the career I want, the love I want, or the life I want. My OCD’s version of “logic” isn’t even logical. Yes, I understand how the breakup means feelings of low self worth which will then topple into feeling bad about other things. But why has my brain been wired to think this way? Why does it seem so easy for everyone else to function normally with life but not me? Honestly this is the first time in my life where I’m dedicated to focusing on myself and learning more about myself instead of others in my life and it’s a very odd and bizarre feeling. I’m excited of course, but I’m also scared. My ocd makes me ruminate like “what if I will never make the most of this life I’ve been given”, “what if I truly have no worth and the most I will ever be in other people’s lives is a background character”, “why do I care if I’m a background character or not? I should feel guilty and ignorant for assuming everyone will automatically like me”, “are people lying to me when they call me pretty, smart or kind?”, “I need to look and sound perfect in both pictures, videos and in real life. I will never be satisfied for accepting who I am now”, and a bunch of other annoying questions. But sometimes it’s like I just can’t take the reality for what it is but at the same time, but I also acknowledge that I know this is ocd talking. This is so, so difficult. Do I make any sense with what I’m saying? Can anyone help?

Hi everyone. <3 was wondering if anyone with experience dealing with excoriation/skin-picking disorder has some tips or tricks that have particularly helped them. Came to NOCD this week for help - first timer that would really like to be able to wear a tank top again 😅🫠 I did join the BFRB support group but unfortunately will be on a night shift this week when it meets . Thank you in advance ❤️

Hiiii, I’m Sara 💖 and I have Severe OCD 🧠, Severe Excoriation Disorder ✋, ADHD ⚡, GAD 😰, and Major Depressive Disorder 🌧️. I love using emojis if you haven’t noticed lol. To keep this as straightforward as possible I want to focus on the OCD and dermatillomania part today. I hope this can help some people 💬 and maybe give others a better understanding of what it’s like to live with these two issues! ☺️ I have always struggled with skin picking, especially on my face 😔, and it has made my acne worse and caused scarring. 🤕 I did not realize until my therapist told me that it can be connected to OCD. Sometimes I do not even notice I am doing it, and other times I am aware but cannot stop. 😓 For me, the OCD side is often tied to perfectionism or needing that just right feeling. 🫠 From thoroughly washing my face and hands, overusing or meticulously applying products to make sure the “ritual” is done perfectly takes both time and money. To having picking episodes which causes scars to heal slower⏳ and to also leave me with a “pepperoni face” 🍕 from all the red and raw wounds or with widespread hyperpigmentation that lingers for months. Oof 😅 ERP IS A LIFE SAVER!!! 🛟 Addressing that OCD pattern is a big part of ERP, Exposure and Response Prevention 🚪. ERP helps you face the discomfort without picking or fixing, so over time your brain learns the urge does not need to be acted on. 😤 Behold~ another technique, HRT! Habit Reversal Training can still be part of treatment, but timing matters ⏰. If OCD is the main driver, starting HRT too early, especially if it leans on avoiding triggers, can unintentionally strengthen the OCD cycle 🔄. That is why ERP often comes first, and HRT is added later once the compulsion has weakened. 🤗 Skincare time! Oooo la la la 🤭 For wound care 🩹, I keep it simple. When the skin is still open, I use a gentle cleanser 🫧, a moisturizer 💧, and Aquaphor directly on the wound, then keep it covered to protect it from bacteria 🦠 and UV exposure 🌞. Once the wound has closed and turned pink 🌸, I use a gentle cleanser, a moisturizer, a scar cream, and SPF daily to prevent discoloration and help the scar fade. Fidget toys 🪀 do not work for everyone (Ik people who love it 😍), but ERP paired with steady skin care has made the biggest difference for me ✨. If possible, I recommend seeing a dermatologist 🩺 to help heal your skin and give you tools for long term care, and ask directly if they understand skin picking and OCD and will keep that diagnosis in mind while treating you. Progress is absolutely not linear 📉📈. You will have times when you pick or have an episode, even when your skin has been looking great. 😥 That does not mean failure ❌. In OCD, compulsions are rewarded in the moment because anxiety drops after you do them, so the brain learns that the behavior works 🤥. ERP builds new learning that competes with the old habit rather than erasing it, which means stress, hormones, sleep loss, or strong cues can still light up the old pathway at times ⚡. The goal of therapy and strategies is not to create a life with zero urges 🚫, but to help you navigate 🧭 life with OCD by reducing how often urges show up, how intense they feel, and how quickly you recover when they happen. Most important part EVERR 😮‍💨🥰 The most important part of this process is practicing self compassion 💕 and remembering that no one is perfect 🌼. Every lapse is information you can use for the next step forward! 🫂 Thanks for listening to my Ted talk! 😄 (edited) (edited)