Obsessed with engagement

So me and my boyfriend have been together for over two years and we’ve gotten to a point in our relationship where taking the next step is a conversation and something we want to do. So I had suspicions that he’d propose to me this past summer because one day I came home from work and their was a weird vibe and I asked him if he had done anything in the engagement genre and he said yes. So I knew he was planning something. As summer went by at one of our parties he got drunk and accidentally told me he was going to propose to me this fall. I became absolutely obsessed with this and I would drive myself crazy with excitement. And not in a small way like I had to start picking up hobbies to distract me from thinking about it because I was so obsessed it made me sick because I wanted to know when it was gonna happen. Any excuse I had to ask him for hints or opening in a conversation where I could talk about it I would. About a month ago he sat me down and told me he isn’t sure if he’s gonna be emotionally ready for to propose this fall like he thought he was. He said he thought he was ready but because of how obsessed I was with it started to make him feel like it wasn’t his choice anymore and he got too overwhelmed. So now I’m incredibly upset and I’m mad and I don’t know what to do with myself because I can’t let myself be obsessed about it happening this fall anymore because idk if it will and I’m in an incredibly bad cycle with it. Does anyone have any advice because I’m driving myself crazy

Lucy Van Pelt

Date posted: 21d

If you love him just be content being with the person you love, not everyone is lucky enough to find that. If more comes of it, amazing but if not you can be happy and excited still to spend your time with the one you love

cappsrissa

Date posted: 21d

Girl, my boyfriend got a ring sizer off tiktok shop a week ago and I’ve been obsessing over the thought of him finally planning this next chapter. I’ve been thinking about when, how, and where to the point where it drives me crazy because I love him so much. What helps me us is to not push away the thoughts but kinda sit and just push through. Do something with your partner, enjoy the small things in life with him and try to remind yourself that: there’s plenty of time and it’s sweet that he’s planning it and wants some more time! I feel like he just cares about you and didn’t mean to make you upset. Him having more time to plan it out can be seen as good too, you know. Rushing into anything isn’t necessarily good, so if he feels as though more planning needs to go into the proposal, then that shows he really wants to make it special. I know how hard it can be to obsess over these things. Me and my bf have been together for over two years as well. I’m hoping the absolute best for yall, remember to take care of yourself

Tea and Honey

Date posted: 21d

So so sorry to hear this. All of your emotions of being upset about this (and being excited) are totally normal. OCD tends to latch onto things, so if you notice that something is OCD, then it's time to practice things from your ERP therapy to kit. Eventually, you will feel better and better. :):)

avamay

Date posted: 20d

I’m so thankful for everyone’s replies

Tea and Honey

Date posted: 20d

@avamay Big hugs!!! 💙💙🩵🩵 You need them!! You will get through this :):):)

avamay

Date posted: 15d

Update I’ve made it so bad he can’t even promise me we’re not gonna break up

BC123

Date posted: 18w

Relationship OCD

I’m struggling a ton rn and would love some insight from people. My bf and I broke up bc my OCD got to the point where it was extremely damaging to my exes mental health. We’ve been on a break for the last 2 months while I get therapy and help and he wants to try again in August. We talk everyday and fall asleep on the phone but I’m miserable anxious about what he’s been doing during the break. My mind is flooded with the idea that he might follow new girls on Instagram or he flirting and talking to new girls. It’s KILLING me. I’ve made up an entire situation w no proof. And I’m scared it’s not my OCD talking but a gut feeling. I know we aren’t together but it’s not fair to emotionally invest in each other if he’s not being loyal like I am. I’m just losing my mind and need help honestly.

RidingTheWav...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 10w

Obsessing about getting engaged

Heya guys- any advice welcome! I'm in a happy and loving relationship with my partner (M) for 5 years. I am going on 32 next month and am anxious to get married and start a family. My OCD has really latched onto getting engaged and it's almost like I have anticipatory anxiety ? I feel like my time will never come. We moved into a house last August and I kinda thought things would have progressed more since

"Pure" OCD

Kay-Cee

Date posted: 9w

Obsession over texting habits

So for context, I've just started seeing someone. He's really handsome, sweet and very respectful. He has ADHD, so he's quite literally all over the place; Impulsive behavior type things. Well, he's starting to get inconsistent with texting and when that's the only communication we use, it becomes a battle for me. He always says he's working, which to be fair, he is, but it didn't stop him in the beginning. Again, I know he has ADHD and no two days are alike, that being said, I notice even the slightest change in texts. It's quite literally a curse. So I over analyze EVERYTHING to point of anger and tears, then I obsess if he even still likes me, if he's slowly phasing me out or ghosting me. Then when he does message me, I feel some sense of relief, but I notice he's not the same as he was before. He's done this to me a couple times, so I'm getting used to it. He told me yesterday he couldn't come see me because he was fixing his car, which he was - he showed a picture and posted them online, too. He's a car enthusiast, so he's always doing crazy things like that. So I woke up with the knowledge that he was working on his car today, only to find out he went to the beach. It felt like a punch to the gut. I tried reasoning with myself that maybe he went with his parents or a friend and he still had to finish working on his car, but then the dark, obsessive thoughts started creeping in and I spent the entire day miserable and over analyzing all of our texts and constantly checking to see if he still follows me on Instagram. I didn't even realize my OCD was this bad. I really just thought it was perfectionism, and it still is, but I'm afraid it's about relationships, too, and I'm concerned that I'll be this way with every man I date, given I actually find one 😔

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Obsessed with engagement

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