Help ….this is too difficult

I have struggled with contamination OCD. I have been working through it and making some progress although I have been in the same spot as you and it feels so overwhelming. I’m not exactly sure what the trigger was but my advice would be to take a second and assess the situation. Try to slow down and not react right away. ERP is exposing yourself to triggering situations and then not doing your compulsions for example over cleaning or washing hands when you don’t need to, that’s is the response prevention part. It is very hard and challenging not to do the compulsions but if you are able to not do the compulsions and sit with the anxiety and discomfort it helps your brain overtime to change. You could maybe start by doing what you think anyone else who doesn’t have OCD would do in response to the same situation and then sit with any anxiety that could come up without doing compulsions. For example you said it is going to take hours to decontaminate from this trigger, what would someone else do if they didn’t have OCD, if they only did a quick clean or didn’t clean at all then do that and then sit with the thoughts and anxiety that comes up. Some responses that have helped me when my brain is screaming at me is, this is a thought, it doesn’t have to be a threat, maybe I will get sick, maybe not but no matter what happens I can handle it. Also telling your brain thank you for those thoughts I know you are trying to keep me safe but I have things to do today and I am not going to investigate this now. What I have found is the more you are able to resist compulsions the easier it gets, it’s kinda like a muscle you have to workout and the more you resist compulsions the stronger you get. I hope this helps in some way, let me know if you have any questions, I’d be happy to answer.

I can relate to what you are saying, I have felt the same!! First I would say reassurance doesn’t work with OCD, sometimes it might provide temporary relief at best but OCD is never satisfied, OCD will come up with one more what if or something else to cause doubt so people trying to reassure you will never satisfy OCD. Natasha Daniel’s has a great short video on YouTube about this. I would say you could start by trying to figure out what are you avoiding or what are you maybe overdoing. For example I used to over wash my hands and I used to avoid touching the kitchen sink. So some exposures became touching the kitchen sink and then touching things around the house without washing my hands for 15 minutes and then I could wash my hands or with washing my hands I had to work to only use one pump of soap and only wash my hands a short amount of time and then rinse…those are just examples but you could think of what things the OCD is targeting and it’s pretty much doing the opposite of what OCD is telling you and then sit in the uncertainty. The goal of OCD recovery is to be able to accept uncertainty. For example sometimes OCD thoughts pop in my head to not use that hand towel cause it could be dirty so I make a point to use that towel to go against what OCD is saying. It has taken me time to get used to it. There are some great videos on YouTube through NOCD or I came across Natasha Daniel’s who is a child therapist for OCD that both have great videos to learn more about OCD. But a therapist was really helpful too to be able to walk me through everything. Hopefully you will be able to find a therapist that takes your insurance. Oh and Jenna Overbough I think her name is, is also an OCD therapist who has some online courses and resources for anxiety and OCD. I hope that helps in some way!!

Something I try to keep in mind in different situations is ‘what would be good for my recovery.’ And many times it is the riskier and more uncomfortable thing. But I am always so glad in the long run when I do the hard thing.

Also have compassion on yourself this is tough stuff, sometimes it’s 2 steps forward and 1 step back. You can do this!! ❤️

Was this woman a friend to you?

? Im not sure if you meant to respond to a different post ? I didn’t mention any woman in my post?

No worries

I was just hoping someone who has Contamination OCD would read my post and be able to offer me advice or encouragement

If it’s helps at all one of my exposures for contamination OCD was to change my baby’s dirty diaper and then touch a commonly touched item in the room without washing my hands first and to sit with any anxiety and discomfort that comes up, or another exposure I did was to pet my dog and then eat something without washing my hands. Just to give you some ideas of contamination exposures. I started first with easier exposures and worked my way up to harder ones. But working with a therapist did help to guide me through everything but just to give you an idea to get you started. When doing exposures it sometimes got worse before it gets better sometimes called an extinction burst so if you feel more anxiety stay the course and do what you need to do which is reduce compulsions. Also if you can’t totally not do compulsions you can also delay compulsions or reduce compulsions which all help. Every little bit helps, celebrate every little win, each little win adds up, every little win of not giving into a compulsion helps. Hang in there, it does get better. ❤️

Thank you so much for trying to help! I just got done decontaminating …it took 4 hours. So I will read what you wrote and resspondin the morning

Thank you…that’s great advice

I just read your message regarding the kitchen sink example …thank you for the resources …I will definitely look up Natasha on YouTube . I do watch a lot of NOCD podcasts on YouTube which are very helpful. Patrick McGrath is amazing and very wise. I really appreciate all of your advice and time. Thanks again!!