What should I do if my OCD is getting way out of control, but I cannot afford therapy? Like I literally cannot function on any level right now, I can't do basic tasks. I feel ridiculous. Does nocd still have those weekly zoom calls? Like as a group, and free?
I still get the automated emails, so they must still be running. Preferably I would get one on one sessions, but I've got to take what I can get
You can try doing exposures on your own. Start slow. Ask ChatGPT to make you a hierarchy of exposures based on your fear and see how you feel. The goal of therapy is to let yourself feel the discomfort and uncertainty “maybe x is true, maybe it isn’t.” The hard part of ERP therapy is that your brain will not want to accept that. However if your OCD is that severe I would at least invest in an appointment with a psychiatrist to potentially get medication prescribed.
I'm already on medication. Unfortunately it does more for my depression than the OCD. Just this morning my dad made me a peanut butter & jelly sandwich, and he used a knife that hadn't been fully resting on the cutting board, but did lightly graze/scrape it. A cutting board that I perceive to be dirty. Raw meat has been on it before 😫, and I don't think it gets wiped down anywhere near enough. It's even been permanently stained from how rarely and how little it gets cleaned. Then again, it's also super old. I do believe a lot of my ocd that started 7-8 yrs ago now, was initially triggered by my parents neglectfulness, specifically a lack of maintaining a household. That, and working at McDonald's, which "actually was" an unsanitary environment. Also, my dad used separate knives for the jam & peanut butter to avoid cross contamination, but he still managed to accidentally touch the jam and get a tiny bit of jam in the peanut butter jar. I'm trying to remind myself that jam isn't refrigerated in the store anyway, so maybe it doesn't matter if it got in with the peanut butter. Anyways I'm still feeling uncomfortable, and I won't know for 6 hours if I've gotten food poisoning. A lot of my exposures actually happen unintentionally, and then having to try to sit with that anxiety/resist doing something to neutralize. In some ways I'm grateful for it, because ik deep down it's what I need, but that doesn't change the fact that it really doesn't feel good right now
@AnimaLover19 Well you’ve been triggered. Now you follow through. Maybe the board was clean enough, maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you’ll get food poisoning in 6 hours, maybe you won’t. “I tried to remind myself it’s not refrigerated in the store.” That’s self reassurance and will keep you stuck. The harder you try to repel that negative possibility, the tighter OCD holds you. Maybe it is refrigerated in the store. Open yourself up to the negative possibility and then try to carry on with your day as normal.
If you have someone close to you I recommend letting them know how much you’re struggling. I feel like having OCD can be very isolating but that’s what it wants. Hopefully having some support can help in the meantime and maybe try grounding exercise as well.
My family doesn't understand me
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