Another sleepless night. Rant 20+ only

Adults only Planned to go to bed at 2 to sleep at 3am like usual. Couldn't. It's now 5 in the morning. I'm pissed off and I left my room. I had the urge to punch the nearest pillow and so I did. Tried to watch meditation videos and listen to them but they just weren't helping. Now I'm just sitting out of my room. Kind of just hoping for my mind to just shut the fuck up and my body to just go to sleep. At this point I just want to get ERP started right away so that these thoughts can just GO AWAY. I already know what's gonna happen as time goes on. I'm gonna sleep like shit, I may get a headache, I'm gonna be really grumpy like I was last night and I'm gonna have a meh day. I don't even feel tired when I want to sleep. I felt tired when taking a nap and that lasted two hours. Now when I want to sleep all that happens is that I focus on my thoughts, can't sleep, and then I open my eyes back up. Rinse and repeat. This shit never ends and I'm so tired of it.

hanysm@gmail...

Date posted: Yesterday

Hi. Don’t try to force the thoughts to stop — your brain’s job is to think and solve problems, so telling it not to think only creates a loop that leads to frustration. Instead, try grounding yourself: read a book, take a break from social media, focus on your breathing, or do something that brings you back to the present moment.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 17h

This stuff barely helps. I just try to go for guided meditation videos and hope they work. I can't guarantee that any of this works, only hope that they can

hanysm@gmail...

Date posted: 13h

@BigGyro09 Things often begin in very small ways and gradually grow over time. It might not feel like much at first, but as you stay engaged with real life, things can slowly start to improve.You are not alone in what you are facing; many people here have gone through similar struggles and have been able to overcome them. With the right support, especially from a therapist, there is real hope that things will get better.

Anxious Chao

Date posted: Yesterday

I’m going through this shit too. I just want to scream or yell or cry or something. I’ve been through hell and back. From false accusations, narcissistic abuse, the chronic loneliness, etc. it’s killed my soul and my spirit alongside the intrusive thoughts. I’ve tried watching meditation videos too but I can’t sit with the thoughts cause they feel so damn real I can’t take it anymore. I’m thinking of going through ect again as that distorts your memories little by little, or enrolling in a partial hospitalization program but I’m moving out so I can’t :(

BigGyro09

Date posted: 16h

Hey, are you seeing a therapist? Are you getting support from friends and family? Are you doing anything to just be patient with yourself and just give yourself any kindness you need? I really hope you have that support because you really do deserve it. I'm really sorry that all of this is piling onto you and I really wish the best for you. :) You won't be in this position forever

Manda5555

Date posted: 20h

I feel this deeply. Sometimes it can take me upwards of 4 hrs to fall asleep bc of ruminating thoughts and not being able to shut my brain off. I have recently started using ice packs and putting them on the back of my neck when trying to sleep and those thoughts are taking over. It shocks the body a bit and takes my mind off of thoughts sometimes bc I focus on the sensation. I also try at that point to put on some green/brown/white noise and focus on slowing my breaths with the ice pack. Sometimes guided mediation at that point keeps me awake more. Those are my new attempts to slow my brain down and redirect it. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. I’m not sure if any of those suggestions may help but I just figured I would put that out there.

truetrev

Date posted: Yesterday

I wish i could help! We are all here for you, we’ve been there. You are not alone and you will get past this

hlex99

Date posted: Yesterday

I’m right there with you currently. Hopefully it gets better for both of us soon

BigGyro09

Date posted: 17h

Thank you. I hope ERP really turns things around for me

worryywart

Date posted: 20h

:(( ik it’s hard right now but it does get better, i’m always here for you. don’t be too harsh on yourself and keep trying what you know works for you, don’t let the bad days discourage you as we all have them!

BigGyro09

Date posted: 16h

Thank you. I feel like I'm only hoping to use what works instead of knowing for sure it does. I did have days where I was okay and this is just one day where I wasn't. It just gets me so mad though. I hate not getting sleep and it really bothered me last night.

Booknerd7

Date posted: 11h

Sorry you’re going through this. I’ve definitely had my bouts of no sleep. To say it was horrible is an understatement. Hang in there, this will pass.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 11h

I've had a lot worse. I did get 5 hours of sleep. There was a time I went 2 full days without proper sleep. It was horrendous

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