SOOCD - sexual and romantic attraction

Anyone else with SOOCD (well I hope it’s that!) and ROCD worried about sexual and romantic attraction? I feel I’m the exception 😔. Considering a relationship is about sexual and romantic attraction, I feel like it’s “real”. I used to be able to be like “a relationship isn’t just about sex” but then it became focussed on romantic attraction and fear of falling in love with a woman. I scan myself for feelings when interacting with women and it feels I prefer women and would be happier with a woman. This happens with pretty much all women I interact with, including female family members. Also get triggered by women on tv and radio. Brain constantly telling me women are better in every way and that everything special I have with my boyfriend I can replicate with a woman and have even more and better. Every positive thing I think about my boyfriend is instantly replaced with a thought of but you can find a woman like that. It’s like there is nothing unique about my relationship anymore as I can have the exact same and better with a woman! My boyfriend has literally been turned into a woman in every way! I feel so alone with this. It’s been going on for so long, and that feels like evidence! Help!

Vjeze

Date posted: 22h

My latest theme is SO OCD as well. Just know that youre not alone. And you can handle this. There is plenty of good video’s about this topic as wel to educate yourself. But even then its rough sometimes. For me its the checking and lack of attraction to women all of the sudden that is the hard part

Anonymous

Date posted: 20h

worst themes ever. i struggle with this too and am constantly checking my feelings and questioning things. sometimes when im laying with the guy im talking to my brain will picture him as a girl and i immediately cringe and get scared of my thoughts. I have gotten a lot better at not letting it get to me as much, but its so hard and disturbing. i pray that it gets better for you, we got this🫶🏻

Anonymous

Date posted: 19h

Hey Lizzie, thanks for sharing your burdens. I wanted to offer a perspective in case you are interested. OCD loves to grab onto anything it feels it needs to obsess over…as we know WELL. Lol. Our world today is stuck in confusion about sexuality, and there are two reasons why - Satan’s persuasions, and our own inherent sin. The Bible explains that God’s design was for sex to be shared joyfully between man and woman in the covenant of marriage, and make no mistake, there are beautiful verses covering deep sensuality to be joyfully shared between man and woman in marriage! (Proverbs 5:19) But God also teaches us that we are confused and sinful by nature without him (Jeremiah 17), and one way sin manifests is in sexual immorality. Sexual immorality is generalized and just looks like lust and sexual activity between people of the same sex, opposite sex, polyamory, coveting someone else’s spouse, etc. (Galatians 5: 19-21) meaning there is no such thing as having a sexual orientation outside of heterosexuality - there is only God’s design, and our sinful immorality. BUT the Lord heals and changes our hearts when we accept Him as our savior, and the things that brought us pain are exchanged for God’s truths that bring us life! (Ezekiel 36:26-27). Aside from our own sinful nature without God, Satan is always trying to destroy us (1 Peter 5:8) and pull us away from God and encourage us to stay confused…he is called the father of lies (John 8:44) and has created counterfeits to the true blessings of God. The counterfeit of love and sexual intimacy between man and wife is “lust”, a false version of love that has no commitment or security. God exposes Satan’s lies with lust by teaching us that lust is a “fleshly” self-indulgent counterfeit to love that can only lead us to pain and confusion and away from God (James 1:14-15). God designed YOU wonderfully (Psalm 139: 13-14) and wants us to honor and protect our hearts and bodies from harm (1 Corinthians 6:18). He wants you to lean on Him for understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6) and healing your confusion around sexuality and establish in you a confident identity as a heterosexual woman who will marry a wonderful man someday! Any shame or guilt you may feel around lustful thoughts you can lay at God’s feet and feel no heavy burden from it anymore (Psalm 55:22)- He wants you to be healed but you must repent (turn away from the ways of the world and your sinful nature) and accept Him as your Lord and Savior! (Acts 3:19) He will set your path straight and true, and He will teach you about how He designed you so wonderfully. I just want you to know that God loves you, and if you repent and accept Him as your Lord and Savior, He will continue to guide you. Don’t be afraid by the intensity of this message, as OCD might want to make you obsess over Satan, immorality, all the tough things around sin - know that God wants to give you clarity and peace by being direct with His words, not put you in a place of fear. He wants to save you from your pain! I hope this message reaches you well. If you ever want to talk more, message back on here and we can find a way <3 - Kara

Kai on the Wall

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 18h

Hi! While I think it's great that you're trying to help, I don't believe this comment is useful for someone with OCD. Shame and guilt are what feed this disorder.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

@Kai on the Wall Hey there Kai! Totally agree, if I didn’t highlight that enough I apologize. OCD does often take take therapy and treatment to understand and heal from, can’t just “pray it away” or anything. The fixation over shame and guilt that grips us with OCD can continue to be healed, as a separate point my note was just that with sexuality, shame and guilt can come from living in confusion, and God wants us to be healed of our guilt and shame through learning His design for our bodies, hearts, and lives. Sexual confusion (what anyone can struggle with) vs fixation over shame and guilt (what us with OCD experience and are learning to heal)

LV4523

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 19h

Definitely relate! Just remember that you can prefer women for many things in life without it making something deeper. I have a bf of 3 years, and I would way rather go shopping with my friends than with him. I also prefer gossiping with my girl friends over him. I prefer having a team of women at work. We as women just get each other. And that’s a NORMAL thing. Feeling close to women in your life is normal because we are a community! OCD loves to take normal things like that and twist them around. You’ve got this!!!

jacky :)

Date posted: 8h

Literally under the same boat. It comes and goes with me, but this week it’s been bad. Doesn’t help that I have the bad habit of looking at certain porns to see what I get aroused by (warning, DO NOT do this… it will make things worse). Just know you’re not alone, hoping for the best ❤️

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