Advice to escape this flareup. TW

For the past... I want to say week or so, I've had extreme paranoia that has been clinging to certain subtypes. One of them is my virtual footprint. I've been cutting down on social media a lot to remedy this, even considering deleting some major chatting apps to reduce this anxiety. But my worst case scenario is a data breach that will expose everyone to this, where noone is safe, as I know a lot of these apps don't even delete messages when you delete your account. It's driving me kinda crazy. I think about it the second I wake up and it continues foe the rest of the day. I can't even focus on work and my deadlines are coming up soon. I know I've grown up a lot over the years, but the idea of my trauma induced hypersexuality years being exposed and other conversations I've had with friends that I thought were private makes me very scared. Am I overthinking things? Am I trapping myself in a place I'll never escape from? Anyone else have the same flareups I've had and if so, how did you escape this?

RabbitHearted

Date posted: Yesterday

That sounds super overwhelming and scary for sure. I know when I start ruminating on all my "what ifs" and worst case scenarios, it becomes very important to take the time to identify what is within my control and what is outside of my control, and to remind myself that I am doing everything I can reasonably do about the situation & the rest is simply out of my hands and that is okay. Which is really scary, but it's very important to be able to tolerate that uncertainty so that we don't continue to spiral and ruminate and obsess over and over. You've got this!!! 🫶

Generiname

Date posted: Yesterday

You've got a point there. I think it's one of those situations where I wish I could have some control. And having none outside of deleting my old comments makes me incredibly paranoid and upset. I'll try to meditate on this and try to accept that a lot of this is outside of my control. Thank you for your kind response

RabbitHearted

Date posted: Yesterday

@Generiname Good luck! I know these sorts of fears can be really tricky, but I believe in you :)

MilMunch

Date posted: Yesterday

Its not really useful but i just wanted to let you know I’ve experienced very similar thoughts/obsessions about online activity, you aren’t alone and yes i think its just about trying to accept this is out of our control, and if the scenario did happen, we would get through it x

Generiname

Date posted: 23h

I'm trying my best. It's just an awful fear and I wish I could go back in time and be more careful about details I shared online. But I know I can't. And the same can be said for tens of millions of other people in the world, too.

[Deleted]

Date posted: 16h

Comment deleted by user

Generiname

Date posted: 15h

Thank you. Unfortunately I did get a bit of Internet fame which is where my fears stem from. I feel more at risk with more eyes on me and it horrifies me. I just want it to end, you know?

KCSM67

Date posted: 15h

@Generiname yes completely understand , just have to try and accept maybe it will come out I did or said something wrong or maybe it won’t which is probably more likely , either way you’d be strong enough to get through it. It’s life and everyone makes mistakes . I’m also trying to accept and work on the same thing as well . We got this , hope this helped a little at least

Generiname

Date posted: 15h

@KCSM67 It did, thank you. I know it's just a bad flareup and it'll pass, but it feels as if the danger is in the room with me right now. I KNOW how much I've grown and how much I've changed. A snapshot of the past should not undervalue my progress.

Generiname

Date posted: 15h

@KCSM67 It's awful, isn't it? I wish I could be someone who could just accept it and get on with their life. But I have OCD. You definitely aren't alone with those thoughts, the past few weeks it has been my major obsession and it's made getting out of bed difficult. When I wake up I'm going to try and get some work done and maybe treat myself to something nice. You should do the same for yourself.

Generiname

Date posted: 14h

@KCSM67 Yeah... I've flip flopped between obsessions over the past few months but this one is always the most debilitating. We'll get through this. Wishing you nothing peace

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond