Does anyone else’s false memory ocd try to tell them that the intrusive thought / false memory you are having is in fact not false memory ocd and is reality and you actually did do the thing it is trying to convince you that you did?
Yes, that’s exactly what makes false memory OCD so hard. And the more you think about it, the more real it will seem, even if it is not.
I still have those ocd guilt feelings and the intrusive thoughts/false memory is still present in my head but I’m working on trying not to let it dictate my day any longer. It’s very difficult and I’m far from healed. But I haven’t had a panic attack in over a week now so I’ll take that as a win. Day by day.
@It.girl that is very good. I act as if the thing really happened, and absorb the guilt I would if it did. Do you have the same experience?
@It.girl proud of you
@ocdbelowzero Yeah that’s exactly what I do. So right now I’m struggling because the intrusive thought of “did you kiss someone/ cheat on your boyfriend on your girls trip last summer”. This thought never entered my mind before now because I know I didn’t kiss anyone or cheat on my trip. But my ocd was triggered because someone at work told me they heard the guy they were talking to messaged me trying to hit on me (which didn’t even happen) and it through me into an ocd spiral . First my ocd was trying to convince me I cheated on my man with the person who my coworker was talking to. Then when I finally had clarity on how ridiculous that was because it never happened, then my ocd jumped to “well did you kiss someone on your girls trip last summer”. Logically I know I didn’t but I’ve been so in my head idek what’s reality anymore when I’m in the thick of it. I love my man and know I would never cheat on him. I know I didn’t cheat or kiss anyone but the guilt feels SO real . 🥲
@It.girl I can relate so much. I go through the same thing, except it is not linked to any actual thing, it is pure delusion, or at least some very normal or just random interactions that get twisted into cheating. I wrote about it a few posts back. It is one of the hardest obessions for me, I would die for my woman in a heartbeat so this really really really bothers me. I hope we get better.
@It.girl it is a rare thing to have someone in this world that cares so deeply about their love/partner as you do for your boyfriend. I really hope you find peace, will pray for you.
@ocdbelowzero Thank you. One day at a time, we got this. One of my compulsions is to tell my boyfriend every intrusive thought I have (he is so understanding of my ocd struggles), so I’m working on not doing that. I caved last weekend and had a full blown melt down and told him about this false memory I’m dealing with and he was so supportive and reassured me I’m not my thoughts. I’ve struggled with false memories before so this is nothing new for me but the fact it’s attacking my relationship is really hard for me. Usually me telling him my intrusive thought would make the anxiety go away but this time it hasn’t. My ocd keeps saying “talk to him about it one more time. He needs to know the more you’re in your head the more you are unsure. I know you don’t think you kissed anyone but are you sure?” Like it’s literally insane .. but I have stopped myself from bringing it up to him again because logically I know I didn’t do anything wrong and this is an intrusive thought and I don’t want to feed the ocd cycle. But it is very hard. I’m so anxious all the time.
@It.girl Also I keep reassuring myself that hypothetically had I kissed someone I wouldn’t have forgotten about something like that and then randomly thought of it 5 months later. The coworker saying something to me about someone potentially messaging me threw me into an ocd spiral and my mind just concocted this intrusive thought/false memory during the midst of an ocd spiral
@It.girl Omg this is literally my life - Makes me doubt my morals - makes me think I cheated on my boyfriend every time I go out and just forget when there is no evidence that I did, and morally never would. Only comes up days or weeks later and never immediately the next morning, which is why I know it’s OCD. Let’s trust ourselves and our love for our boyfriends and tell our evil thoughts that they are irrelevant!
Yes it's really tough but trying to get stronger everyday, I hope you do too, hang in there!
Do you guys have any tips on knowing that is in fact a false memory?
my life everyday.
@ocdbelowzero I feel so stupid because I have responsibilities and stuff I need to focus on and can’t move past this because it feels so horrible.
@ocdbelowzero I know the feeling. I just keep telling myself “this is an ocd intrusive thought brought on during an ocd spiral (I’ve been in a flare up since October) and I don’t need to engage.” Even if I don’t believe it every time I say it to myself, because the ocd makes it feel so real, it still helps ground me.
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