This is going to take time to get used to

I feel free. I feel grief. I feel fear. I feel excited. The skills I've learned really have allowed me to move through life with more psychological grace. I wasnt a light case either, I have had several hospital trips due to ocd including seizures from panic attacks. So now I am really just figuring out how to be alive without the constant threat of a "what if" storm. My exposures mostly consist of confronting the idea that ocd might come back. And it might. And it might be awful. But it will be tolerable. And I will ne able to confront, accept and observe it. I'm lucky ro be alive, even if my experience as a person is hard.