im getting crazy

A few months ago, about six or seven months ago, I adopted rats as pets, and they mean everything to me. But sometimes I feel like my OCD is getting in the way of taking care of them, because every small detail that happens turns into something I ruminate about all day. For example, if one of them doesn’t want affection at a certain moment, I start ruminating that he doesn’t like me anymore, that he hates me, and things like that. If one of them eats a little less, I immediately start thinking he’s sick, that he might die, that I need to take him to the vet. Any small situation becomes something huge in my mind. I also find myself constantly monitoring them. All of this is mentally exhausting, but I don’t know if this is OCD, because I can’t clearly identify what the obsessions and compulsions are. Maybe the compulsions are asking ChatGPT if something is normal, what something means, or looking for reassurance on Reddit, or maybe it’s just the rumination itself. I don’t know. My OCD has always been mostly about relationships, ROCD, and that is more under control now. But I feel like these other things, which might also be OCD but that I didn’t pay as much attention to before (bc I was foccus on the ROCD that was fck TERRIBLE to me), are getting worse day by day. And I don’t know how to deal with it, because I don’t even know if this is OCD or not. Maybe I’m just faking it. Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I had OCD in the past and I don’t have it anymore, or maybe now I’m just pretending and it’s actually just normal anxiety. I don’t know, I really don’t know. I feel desperate, truly desperate.

Anonymous 25#

Date posted: 3d

Hey there ! I can kind of relate to this because I do this with my son. He has a medical condition (he’s fine now) but I went through a lot with him in the beginning and it kind of took a toll on me throughout the years. I would do alot of what you’re doing with thinking the worst about every little thing whether it was a sickness he had, constantly asking him if he’s okay or monitoring how much he would eat etc … those are compulsions. Any time you start to become obsessed or constantly overthink something, any time you catch yourself analyzing or monitoring something, anytime you look for reassurance through a person or online about something those are ALL compulsive and are in relation to OCD. The way I deal with it (and I know it’s hard) but you have to try and sit with the uncertainty. When you catch yourself analyzing or monitoring their behavior pull yourself back to the present moment and when the thoughts come at you respond with “maybe”. “Maybe my rats hate me, maybe they don’t”, “maybe he’ll die or get sick from this, maybe he won’t” “I’ll take him to the vet if he becomes lethargic or starts vomiting” (and stick to that), “I don’t need to figure this out right now”. You’re guna have to do this constantly. I also have ROCD and it was just as awful but it’s the same concept. Good luck !

trying:(

Date posted: 2d

@Anonymous 25# thank you so much!! i’ll try to sit with the uncentainty, its hard bc i feel im neglecting them but its only a intrusive thought so i can deal w it i hope!

lediabledusud

Date posted: 3d

oh man this is exactly what i’m going through with my cat i have horrible anxiety based ocd and it’s making me feel crazy! I woke up almost every hour last night to check on him even though my partner insists he’s okay my brain keeps telling me awful things I know deep down he is just fine I just can’t relax! it’s good to know i’m not alone I hope this gets better for us 🧡🙏🥺

trying:(

Date posted: 2d

@lediabledusud it will get better for us!!❤️

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