Acceptance feels like enduring the pain

I feel like the whole acceptance thing it means to endure the pain. I keep falling back into huge anxiety circles and i start to get tired of it. Everytime i learned a way to not fall into ocd and emotions, it turned into fighting. I feel tired that everyone thinks that I just want to feel happy all the time and dont have negative emotions, or that I want to control them perfectly... Im afraid the answer is that we need to endure the pain and try to do what you choose to do while you feel horrible, and you will feel horrible and at the end of the day you might feel numb or crying but hey accept it, cause we are humans... I went to many therapists, now I try to learn from chatgpt which gave me really good answers and helped alot before, now idk what happened to it but it gives me this answer to everything that seems like i need to endure pain, if i want to focus on something else to not focus on pain thats not possible, its like telling to me you need to be like a robot, do things jist for the sake of doing it, but you will feel horrible and you cant do anything about it and if you want to do something about it then you are controlling and thats why ocd gets stronger...I feel like i wont recover or become better at handling emotions ever cause I cant do this. It seems like the only thing you can do is deciding what you do but still the focus will be on the pain, still you will feel horrible, still you are suffering, and when the emotions decides that it will go away cause it didnt got fuel, then you might be yourself again... this is enduring the pain and a really sad thing in my opinion... I might have control problems then...