I miss hanging out with my dad without this foreboding feeling in the background. I find it hard to maintain eye contact with him now and I feel super awkward around him because of my incest OCD. My compulsions include looking for symptoms of incest or if it's possible for someone like me to do it. I've always noticed people who commit incest rarely regret it and they just don't mind the guilt. My mind would tell me.. "stare for too long in your dad's eyes and you'll fall in love." Or "Oh, you're looking away. That's because you have a crush on him." God... I'm looking away because of these damn awful thoughts. I just miss hanging out with him. I feel like our relationship is going to wither. My incest OCD got over the fear of doing incest part but because I notice dad a lot now because of my obsession, my brain made me think I fancy him. Yes, I do find dad handsome but that's totally normal. However, OCD makes this as another hole to victimize me. "Ooo~ you find your dad handsome. That means you fancy him too." Geezas.. if I find cars beautiful and dolls cute does that mean I'm attracted to them? Nice logic, brain. I would never commit that horrible stuff with him. I love my dad so much and it hurts me that it will never be the same?

@Jamarceline This girls story is actually what made me start freaking out about this. I don’t know if that means i have this type of ocd or if im scared of having it but how did you beat it. Feel like i can’t tell anyone about it because that’s just weird yk

I should add that it often takes time to get used to this practice as it can be difficult not to react. Maybe do it for 5 or 10 minutes per day and increase it from there. Do it every day for a month and see if you notice a change.

@Anonymous Ok, So no matter how disturbing to thought could be you welcomed it? And i know i have pure ocd because I have another theme, It’s just this one happened one i read her story, started fearing if i looked at my moms eyes and stuff. I honestly think my brain is just scared of getting this ocd theme rather than having it. But when you say not push the thoughts away, whenever i try to sit with them they go away on their own. Should i try and remember them on purpose once they start to go away?

@Anonymous I think the goal with sitting with them and not forcing them to go away or doing compulsions is more to get your anxiety down. Honestly, it’s been awhile since I have had an appointment with my therapist, we got to a point where I was sufficient in the exposure response therapy that I no longer need to see her.

@Anonymous Sorry for all the questions, but does it still bother you on a day to day basis. Or is it to the point that when you get a thought you are able to just let it go

@Anonymous Where you able to talk to your parents/family about it

@Anonymous I’m a lot better, but there are days when ocd tries to pull me back into the loop and compulsions. Most days I get the thoughts and they don’t bother me anymore. I only really talked my therapist about it.

@Anonymous I know, I did.

@Anonymous How, i wasn’t having a problem with this at all until i read her story and then i started worrying that would happen to me. Don’t know if i have that ocd or if im scared of having it. Either way would like to know how you did