No medication side effects+ conflict with parents

I have a very severe case of OCD. I have tried 80 mg of Prozac, 200 mg of Zoloft, 10 mg of abilify, 60 mg of buspirone, and I have met with an ocd specialized therapist twice a week since November, and have made not much progress. My Y-Bocs score is in the high 30s. I have tried ERP. I have tried ACT. I have had no side effects to any of the medications above. I just started 10mg of memantine 3 days ago and my psychiatrist is upping it to 20mg a day on Friday, and I tried Xanax, and I felt no side effects from that which I think is rare. I read that 70-90% of people get rapid relief from Xanax. 70 something percent of people SSRIs work for. My therapist at college recommended Roger’s over the summer, but there are a few issues. One is that my anxiety is so high that it is hard to do ERP, so I don’t know if it will be effective. The other issue is that my parents don’t think that I should do it. I’m 20 years old and in college, but my parents get mad when I bring up Roger’s. I can’t even write this without deleting sentences because ocd says if the sentence isn’t important, I wrote it to trigger people (I’ve already deleted 3 sentences). I brought up Roger’s on the phone and my parents said it is off the table for the summer and were mad at me. I don’t know what they have against it, but my therapist ran my insurance through, and found out it would be $3000 for the summer, which I could pay (I have had to pay for all of my appointments since the summer). My dad said that my grandparents on my mom’s side are awful about health (which is true), and would be bad to them about it. I wanted to consider a leave of absence for a semester to focus on my mental health, but it could jeopardize tuition exchange through my dad’s employer, so I pushed through. I also wanted to do an IOP over the winter, and it was the recommendation of my provider. My parents said it costs too much, it would snow too much, my dads former exchange student who wanted to visit wouldn’t understand, I had a commitment to my job (which my mom was intense about me getting). I said I wanted to do an IOP or TMS over winter break, so I didn’t do it over a college semester. My dad said one of the most important things I can do is get my degree. That is a year and half a semester away (I’m a junior). And then I had to get a full time job. What I’m wondering is how I’m going to get the care I need to get. Clearly what I am having now isn’t working, and I feel like the goal posts are moving, since my parents are now talking about how important it is to have income over the summer. Does anyone have advice? Clearly I need more help than I’m getting