G C

Date posted: 20h

relationships/faith/ocd

Need some advice perhaps?? So this is random but I want to be married someday and I don’t go on dates a lot and I pray about it all the time. And I don’t know when random people are interested in me I either shut them all off or like I’m like they could be a future husband or something yk I feel like I’m impulsive and we aren’t suppose to chase after someone else but how do I know If I don’t try they aren’t gonna magically appear. But then I’ll give them a chance sometimes or just cut them off out of nowhere and we like nah they aren’t it I already know or maybe they are a distraction or maybe I’m ignoring the signs of someone who it could be. It’s just a lot does anyone else feel like this? Cuz I don’t wanna make the wrong choice or be distracted but want to experience potentially finding someone and getting myself out there cuz I’m more reserved.

mrsStallman

Date posted: 18h

After reading through your comments I wanted to share two things. Knowing the assurance of my salvation tormented me for years. Look up the book chosen by God by R.C. Sproul. Learning the truth of Gods word is what finally set me free recently. Second, we are all broken people and will never be perfect. Continue to work on yourself but also put yourself out there in a healthy way if you are interested in a relationship. The right person will love you for who you are. My problems really surfaced when I started dating my now husband, there were some hella hard times but this man loved me through them, helped me heal and shown me for the first time in my life what real love is. Many times my problems begged me to quit on our relationship prior to marriage and I’m so glad that I didn’t.

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 18h

@mrsStallman Absolutely wonderful response. Thank you for participating!

G C

Date posted: 18h

@mrsStallman Thank you I appreciate that. I’ll definitely have to look into it

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 20h

What do you think would be the best case outcome

G C

Date posted: 20h

@ChristIsKing That he would respond to me ? Idk. Then if he doesn’t there’s my answer 💀

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing so moral of the story should I not text him hey😭🤣

Anonymous

Date posted: 19h

I think love will magically appear in your life, I feel like personally it should feel like a movie even in the small moments. Remember when you have OCD you have a super power, and not everyone can handle that. You probably push these people away because maybe they can handle you during your good times but they need to be able to save you during the dark times. Remember some people love the obsession part but can’t handle the compulsive, they should love the whole package. I whole heartily believe you will be married one day, it just might take longer than you think it should happen. We suck at patience, it’s just by our design, you could make it happen sooner but it won’t work till it does.

G C

Date posted: 19h

@Anonymous Yeah for sure. I haven’t gotten close enough to anymore to even understand the problems and anxiety🤣🤣

Anonymous

Date posted: 1h

@G C - They are out there, you just have to look past all the inconsiderate ones who think we just turn off and on light switches

G C

Date posted: 19h

Like what if God wants me to heal first cuz no one can handle all my problems rn🤣🤣

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C This is the correct answer. The Spirt convicted me to say this.

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing yeah perhaps

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C You are pretty burdened man, you gotta give it to God. You must practice now so you can be a Godly wife later. And expect the same of your husband.

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing Yeah I try I just think so much😭lol

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing nobody would want all the extra burdens anyway they would be like bro chill

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Lol I’ve been there man, it took so long after my porn addiction to even be able to look at myself in a kind light. It is absolutely not easy fosho. Being a Christian makes it vastly easier tho

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Broooo I get it I dated a girl when I had hella issues and she kinda was like 😃 uh oh rightfully so

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing 💀💀💀

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C It’s a trip man, and I’m still on it with you 💀💀 paranoia messed me up for so long

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing yeah it’s unfortunate. Literally diabolical and I like to extra ham on this app cuz it’s anonymous LOL but in real life def nahh to that extent

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Diabolical is probably the best definition ever. I have been getting clapped for like 14 years now and it’s kinda hard to swallow sometimes it’s gonna be a lifelong thing ? But I’m the same way on here i just say it how it is but I gotta chill irl

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing haha yeah totally

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Keep it up bro you will come out on top. Idk how you type so fast and get so much out but dang

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing Lolll yeah pretty intense

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing I’ll probably post like 20 more today so see you around I guess😭

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Lol we in it together now man I keep seeing you pop up 😭

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing yeahh it’s kind of bad 💀😳

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing It’s either abt this and wanting to text people or what I should do or salvation problems and if I actually Know God or not😁

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Why it is what it is

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing True

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Yea I feel what you mean but I feel like it’s working itself forward somehow idk the way our interaction got casual helps to talk it through without it being like a compulsion. Also may help with the rumination and obsession lowkey but idk yet

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Thought ig in a way this is texting someone

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing Yeah definitely helps to chat

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing Especially when my brain keeps thinking of more and more every second like it never shuts up

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C Agreed makes it less of an echo chamber

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 19h

@G C What are your top thoughts name 5 things

G C

Date posted: 19h

@ChristIsKing Relationships partner wise and family issues/and like how I’m supposed to deal with those in Godly manner and hell and my faith and wondering abt what I’m doing is sin or not cuz it feels like anything I do is and sleeping at night I wake up a bunch and my favorite verse is be still and know that I’m God but I’m never still💀

G C

Date posted: 18h

@ChristIsKing Yesterday it was abt hell and being lukewarm still is but not as bad today cuz goes in waves and today it’s abt reaching out to someone I haven’t talked to cuz I want to idek why.

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 18h

@G C Well let’s start then man. Why would you be interested in reaching out? What would be your intentions? What do you think you’re missing emotionally/physically/intimately. We do a lot of stuff based on that principles alone tbh

G C

Date posted: 18h

@ChristIsKing I mean maybe. I just don’t know what the purpose was for or why he came into my life when he did. And recently my mom has been asking me abt him cuz she is friends with his mom so it was set up basically and he’s just always on my mind cuz I just ruminate on it and just nice to rekindle idk

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 18h

@G C Seems like a normal enough interaction. Might just say hi man it’s normal to do that

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing Yeah I just over think or am like what if it’s Satan and my flesh and I shouldn’t but I might

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing Kind of ended on awk terms but might have been my fault

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 17h

@G C What makes you think it’s your flesh? Give an example

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 17h

@G C Nothing to ruminate on really unless there also is an awkward phase of talking it out but gotta do it at some point

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing Like if I’m not meant to talk to them or I haven’t for a reason and I do it anyway and it’s wrong or something 🤣

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing Yeah I think I’m going to just to get it out of the way so update you shortly lolz

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 17h

@G C Lol ok I think Itll be fine just lmk pretty much the only reason to not talk to someone is if you’re doing it for lustful or greedy gains. Or if it’s damaging to your faith

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing Yeah for sure I just wanna see if there’s any potential just a friendly encounter and if it’s been to be a closed door then it’s a closed door just nervous I hope it’s not damaging to my faith

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 17h

@G C If it ends up being damaging then you will exit the conversation and have your answer ! So it works itself out see ?

G C

Date posted: 17h

@ChristIsKing For sure

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 17h

@G C Word I’ll be waiting

G C

Date posted: 16h

@ChristIsKing I keep almost doing it then hold myself back cuz what if he has a gf now or something that would be mega embarr😂

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 16h

@G C Lmao maybe are you hitting him up for romantic intent ? Then it could be

G C

Date posted: 16h

@ChristIsKing I mean not necessarily but like maybe if there was potential for it but even not it would still be awk

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 16h

@G C Maybe just hit him up and see how he is. Nice to be thought about anyways yk?

G C

Date posted: 16h

@ChristIsKing True

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 16h

@G C It’s worth it anyways man, take a bold first step will make taking the next on easier you feel?

G C

Date posted: 15h

@ChristIsKing Yeah I suppose might as well

G C

Date posted: 15h

@ChristIsKing I sent it and usually I freak out to myself and my friends but I actually don’t feel as extreme as usual cuz it’s just like whatever

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

@G C Nah man, it took so many tries till I found a man who can handle me, but if I can find someone I know you can

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 15h

@G C Exactly man Itll be just fine and if it isn’t youll also be fine Lol

ChristIsKing

Date posted: 15h

@G C Lmk how it goes

G C

Date posted: 6h

@ChristIsKing It was good lol

Anonymous

Date posted: 1h

God is already healing you, just let him bind your thoughts and find your path of love

mrsStallman

Date posted: 17h

I forgot to share resources with you! If you are not a big reader, Ligonier Ministries has many resources you can listen to for free. Here I have shared a link to Chosen by God teaching, as well as another one called Reformed Theology that I just finished listening to.

mrsStallman

Date posted: 17h

https://learn.ligonier.org/series/chosen-by-god

mrsStallman

Date posted: 17h

https://learn.ligonier.org/series/what-is-reformed-theology

G C

Date posted: 20h

And there’s someone I haven’t talked to in like 5 months but think abt him all the time. And I’m like God can he just text me so I know ?? But then I’ve been really wanting to reach out just to check in and say hi not like I wanna date immediately but just to hangout maybe and catch up. But the last thing we talked abt was our different beliefs and he didn’t think he could become more serious so should I not? I just wanna be friends tho for now or is that a waste of time if we aren’t gonna pursue eachother

G C

Date posted: 19h

I also don’t know if I think abt it so much cuz I’m obsessive abt it or it’s an idol I try not to but I just desire it a lot but am afraid to commit cuz I don’t want it to be wrong then also plays a part in the idk if I’m committed to God cuz of my trusting problem

Anonymous

Date posted: 1h

I like to commit with my whole heart and just deal with the heart break, it makes you stronger and brings a clearer picture of what you truly want

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