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- 5y
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- 5y
You can accept thoughts, no need to agree with the content of the thoughts, that is the meaning of acceptance
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- 5y
Holy fuck!! You’re right!! They need to re think the wording on this then ??♀️ it sounds like “yeah you might be right girrr, too bad for you your life might be over and there’s nothing you can do “
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- 5y
This is part of ERP, unfortunately! You can’t be certain about anything. That’s what the response prevention messages get at. It’s supposed to make you uncomfortable.
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- 5y
I do think it’s ridiculous though. It’s not far off when people say “just don’t be anxiou ??♀️ “ I’m not gonna accept STDs cuz I want a family one day and I don’t wanna be abandoned. I will not accept the “possibility” of being infertile
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- 5y
@uwotm8 You’re not accepting STDs. You’re accepting that it is impossible to be certain that you don’t have an STD, or any other illness. It’s not possible to do this instantly. It’s about practice. You can’t out-think OCD, and asking for reassurance guarantees the thoughts will eventually come back. Unfortunately if you don’t try to accept uncertainty, you won’t recover.
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- 5y
@ginac That’s what I mean, I don’t accept that I can’t be certain about that. Why should I? I don’t wanna lose my partner or my fertility ??♀️
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- 5y
@uwotm8 Accepting that uncertainty is the only way to beat OCD. It’s the only treatment that works. I highly, highly suggest you look up Exposure and Response Prevention therapy and read up on it. There are lots of good websites that will explain why and how it works.
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- 5y
@ginac I’ve read it and I don’t get why I’m supposed to accept STDs. I truly truly don’t accept that ever, I’d legitimately rather die
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- 5y
@uwotm8 Accept having thoughts about it, no need to agree with the thoughts
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- 5y
@Markito I feel like I’m being told to accept my fear and I don’t though
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- 5y
@uwotm8 No just accept having the thought about your fear... don’t agree with the content, this is an ERP exercise to create some distance
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- 5y
@Markito That makes more sense to me than what others have said in the past, Thankyou I always feel I’m being told to essentially, suck it up and accept my fears - when I literally can’t
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- 5y
@uwotm8 You are welcome, our minds throw so many thoughts at us on a daily basis, we have the choice which ones to entertain and follow and which ones we just notice and let them be ... we can’t control them anyway...
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- 5y
I know and it's kind of like torture when I have to do the ERP saying this, when I can't stand the fact I could be a lesbian
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- 5y
You’re not a lesbian if you can’t even stand the idea of it
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- 5y
@uwotm8 You saying that kind of gives me bit of hope. Another problem is, my brain makes up this false attraction towards every girl I see and makes me think I'm lesbian. Whenever I see a girl on the internet or in real life my brain immediately starts questioning me and I start getting anxiety and heavy breathing
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- 5y
@sanziday If you knew you WERE a lesbian, it wouldn’t cause you anxiety Also you said it yourself - FALSE attraction!
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- 5y
@uwotm8 You are so supporting but it's really hard to stop but I'll keep whatever you said in mind and start worrying less. Thank you. I also have an irrational fear of being asexual. I fear I'll realize I'm a lesbian later in life
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- 5y
@sanziday You’re welcome! I know it’s hard. I have the same anxiety but different theme. Same beast different symptoms
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- 5y
@sanziday Another thing that I noticed about my own ocd (and yours after speaking to you!) is how much it contradicts itself. For example, my ocd tells me I’m already ridddled with STDs - but also tells me to avoid things incase I BECOME infected! So basically I can see it’s nonsense but it’s still hard to ignore the “what ifs” Your contradictions are “ what if I want to sleep with women” and “what if I never want to have sex again” You’re not alone
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- 5y
@uwotm8 Are these fear common in HOCD sufferers? Like being asexual or not being attracted to boys. On some day I spend fantasizing about boys and completely forgetting I have HOCD but then the next day I fear I'm a lesbian and forcing myself to be straight. Is this common too?
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- 5y
@uwotm8 Omg you completely guessed them correct and what I go through every SINGLE day. You are really understanding
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- 5y
@sanziday I’m not sure how HOCD affects people because I don’t have that specific fear. I have a fear of abandonment. Heck I even fooled around with a girl years ago and I don’t stress over not being straight because I just don’t have that fear. I know it was an experiment and it doesn’t bother me at all, like 0% That’s why I can see your ocd has taken the drivers seat in your case. Shame I can’t always see my own ocd in my own fears ha
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- 5y
Have you got a therapist? For exposure therapy it really needs to be designed more carefully to your personality culture etc. Yes the app is probably basic, it can help, I would suggest getting a therapist.
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- 5y
I’m on a waiting list, gotta wait six months ?
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- 5y
Actually the messages are ok, iv done erp and that's how it works you need to get exposed to your fear (to believe you have std) many times until your brain doesn't care, offcourse you can't accept that or you wouldn't have ocd but you need to learn to accept that,deep down you know it's just ocd but temporarily it will be good if you accepted that possibility
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I keep getting these groinal responses when I think about kids or see one and it's really distressing, I only just learned that OCD can make you feel that and it's not actually attraction but it's so hard to remember that and I've seen people talking about accepting uncertainty but I'm so scared to think "maybe it's attraction maybe it's not" instead of "no it's not attraction that's disgusting" and idk what to do
- Date posted
- 24w
Do you ever feel like people without OCD have an easy time just saying “you need to accept uncertainty” only because they’re not subject to the same level of fear and anxiety as an OCD sufferer would? I feel like they don’t really accept uncertainty, they’re just naturally more certain about things. For example, if you ask anyone whether they think their loved ones are real or not, they will never answer with “maybe, but I’ll never know for sure”. They’ll just say “of course they are”. Isn’t that what certainty is? For me, as I’ve been suffering from existential OCD most of my adult life, such a question absolutely terrifies me. The mere thought of my loved ones and the world not being real sends me into a spiral of anxiety and depression and never ending certainty-seeking behavior. I just can’t stand the thought of that horrible scenario being true. How can one accept uncertainty about such a thought, when it completely undermines all my values and beliefs and world view? Can non-OCD sufferers really accept those nighmarish scenarios? Am I misunderstanding what ERP and therapy is about?
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- 24w
I don’t know what to do I’ve been seeing this guy for roughly 4-5 months and I like him so much like he could be the one. He was in town for something for most of the time we’ve been seeing each other but he recently moved back to his state which is pretty far away. I’m absolutely terrified that I’m going to accidentally get an STD from somewhere like a toilet seat or the other day after taking the bus home I forgot to wash or sanitize my hands before wiping plus I’ve had coworkers and even my roommate admit that they’ve had chlamydia and one has HSV. I’m terrified that I’ll get something and he’ll think I cheated and we’ve both been hurt like that before and I wouldn’t want to put him through that or have him think that of me. I’ve been trying to not google anything or go to the doctors bc those are my compulsion and reassurance seeking things but nothing is helping it’s to the point I don’t want to use the bathroom or do anything does anyone have any tips to help it’s starting to effect my life I know this isn’t possible but I keep thinking it would just be my luck that I’d the odd one out it does happen to
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