my friend told me how when he was in middle school told him that if he made a table for her she would let him slap her bottom. when i heard that story for some reason i started having groinal arousal, but i also i perceived that story in an automatic arousing/attractive way in my brain even if i was against the context. was it maybe the act itself? did my brai age up the scene? is this normal?
Well, I’m not sure of your age, but it’s normal to have those feelings. I have groinal response also
I'm 20, i don't want those feelings. It's not like I enjoyed it or imagined it egosyntonically, but my brain still interpreted that story se&ually and i hate it.
Then you’re fine. Use OCD resources on the practice tab, it helps me a lot because I have constant groinal responses and my exposure gets to an 8
let's say it wasn't intrusive, it was simply how my brain naturally autoamtically perceived the story regardless of the context, in an arousing way, maybe it's the act itself. idk i hope im not abnormal
You’re definitely not abnormal trust me on that. You’re perfectly fine. A lot of respect putting that on here so that we can help emails listed above.
It is the act itself for you. At your age you’re going to go through what happens at your age.
im saying in the story he told it was maybe the action of the event itself not the subjects, that was perceived automatically arousing hope, im saying it clearly
It’s hard to get across in a text message sometimes of what we’re trying to say. Are you still currently thinking about it now?
I’m sorry if you’re having to repeat yourself
You need to put the arousal and groinals into the "OCD" category--not the "Am I a Bad Person" category. In other words, every time the groinals or the arousal shows up, you are checking to see if it makes you a bad person or not. But you need to practice not doing that. Instead, every time those things show up, tell yourself immediately, "This is OCD"; and then throw it in the OCD garbage can 🗑️. You are going to drive yourself crazy if you are trying to "error fix" every time you experience a physical sensation or a thought. Right now, when those thoughts come up, you're trying to figure out if they were bad enough to mean that you are a bad person. But you have to stop trying to figure all of that out. Just throw all of it into the OCD category. And then move on with your life every time it happens. --------------------------- I'm sure you are familiar with the phrase "maybe, maybe not." This phrase can be useful here. In fact, you can tell yourself "maybe I'm a bad person, and maybe I'm not, but I am not going to try to figure it out. Instead, I'm going to keep living my life." I know it is REALLY HARD to change the habits that we have when it comes to OCD. In fact, I am doing the same thing, but in a different way. Every time I talk, I am checking my words to see if they fall into the "blasphemy" category, or if they fall in the "safe" category. I am constantly checking to see if my words or actions are blasphemous. We are doing exactly the same thing, but in different ways! That is because OCD works in the same insidious ways with everybody, just tweaked slightly for each personality. You care about having good morals, so you don't want to have any sexual thoughts that might be immoral. I care about pleasing God. So I don't want to have any thoughts or actions that would be displeasing toward God. And so the OCD attacks us in different ways. But in the end, it's doing the same thing to us. We get presented with thoughts or physical sensations, and our brain is trying to figure out if we are still "safe". The only way out is to stop playing the OCD game. You have to stop trying to figure it out. You have to move on with life no matter how much the OCD says you have to figure it out. Thoughts and arousals are going to come. When they do, just ignore them and move on. Just let them pass. I know I've used this example a lot before... But "thoughts and arousals" are like leaves on a tree. The leaves fall off the tree and float down the river. You can notice that they are there. But you don't do anything about them. You don't change your life. You don't try to stop them. And you don't try to fix them. You just let them fall off and float down the river In the same way, you can practice allowing your thoughts and arousals to just be in your head, and then float down the river. Don't try to figure them out. And don't try to fix them. And don't try to stop them from coming. You will get victory over the OCD when you start doing this. It means you are ignoring all of the OCD demands. You can do this! And your life can get so much better! I know it's hard to see, because I know what this is like. The same thing has happened to me. But the OCD is manipulating us into agonizing over the minutia in our lives so that we can't truly live. But we can get free of this if we practice. ------------ I know, I know, you're probably saying right now, "I'm sure you're right, but ..." And then there will be some reason that you feel like you can't go forward. Maybe you think it just is so bad that you have to figure out the arousals or groinals. Maybe you feel like you are pretty sure I'm right, but since I might be wrong, you better play it safe. OCD is called the doubting disease. You will never be absolutely sure that it's OK to practice the things that I'm telling you to do. That is why you have to just decide to take the plunge. It is a leap of faith. You have to just go forward and do the things that I am saying, even if you're not sure that it is OK. But "take the plunge"! You can do it ! I am telling you to do ERP therapy, which every good therapist would tell you to do. It's scary at first, but ERP therapy is the way out for most people. You got this, my friend.!!
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