How do you draw the line between being safe / responsible/ self aware and giving into compulsions? Such as asking for feedback vs seeking reassurance or being conscious of dangerous situations vs avoidance as a compulsion? Also do you consider doing research a form of seeking reassurance?
I struggle with differentiating as well. I don’t have much advice to give since it is something I struggle with constantly, but I’ll just say what I do is ask myself. I ask myself “why am I doing this?” and that sometimes helps. As for researching I personally do consider this a compulsion, for myself anyways. I am very inclined to research as a way to get reassurance. Researching ocd just to make sure I still have it is something I do veryyyy often. I think with research it would help to apply “why am I doing this?” here as well. I will say it is hard, even if you know what to do, it’s hard to actually apply it at times. Sometimes I will recognize I’m doing a compulsion and still do it anyways just to feel some relief. You’re going to struggle but that’s okay, it’s part of healing. Good luck, you are not alone💕
i think it honestly depends on the scenario especially if it’s one you’ve endured before no problem then it’s easier to differentiate giving into the compulsions vs actually preventing safety. But that’s the whole point really is to accept that some situations may not be safe which is what fights the OCD
If you are taking a perfectionist approach to differentiating between legitimate fears and OCD fears/anxieties (which idk if you are), then you may be having some OCD or anxiety about how perfect you are managing your OCD. I could be totally off but I know how sneaky ocd/anxiety can be so I thought I’d let you know this possibility that came to mind.
@Anonymous Woah I never even thought of this, I’m honestly so shocked how much of my life has been ran by ocd without me even realizing it until now.
@Rach🐌🪷🤸🏻♂️ - As am I. I didn't fully understand my anxiety and insecurity when I was younger, I just felt terrible all the time and assumed something might be wrong with me because of that while simultaneously being too scared to admit this to anyone, so I never got help managing it. Now I'm 24, understand my anxieties and insecurities much better than I used to, and am on my way back up with the help of therapy and ERP.
@Rach🐌🪷🤸🏻♂️ - Since you seemed to resonate with my initial message, I'll mention further that we (and perhaps yourself in this case, idk for sure) have these surface level fears, but because these surface level fears never go away 100% (they never will 100%), we tend to fear that we'll be stuck with them and never get better. This fear of being stuck with anxiety/fear may be what you're experiencing (maybe not) and if it is, you would just go about it similarly to how you go about other fears (resisting compulsions like reassurance and constantly checking if you're OCD management is on point). Idk the precise exact details about a solution that would work best for you here or if you even need one but definitely speak about it with your therapist if you see it necessary. Once I understood my own anxieties and got very specific with what I fear (still getting more specific with my fears as they've been very vague and therefore persistent in the past), I realized that one of my fears was being stuck with other fears I had and that I would not get better. It's unlikely that I'll stay stuck with intolerable anxiety and never improve my life or my relationships, but I sit with the uncomfortable uncertainty of it time to time and I don't fight it and then it passes by naturally as I get on with my life.
@Rach🐌🪷🤸🏻♂️ - And it may sound insane, but once you understand fear of being stuck with fear/anxiety and ultimately let go of that, you may begin to have anxiety that you'll always fear being stuck. If that happens, you let go of that by resisting compulsions and eventually you'll just realize insecurity is a part of life and it is ok. Anxiety/insecurity is not the bad guy in your life once it's understood and managed properly. Best of luck to you!
Research can definitely become a form of reassurance seeking it's one compulsion I struggle with. The way I tell the difference is the need for certainty or comfort. If I'm indifferent while researching or asking for feedback in the sense that I can take it or leave it and I don't need absolutely certainty then I know I'm not performing a compulsion. I think it takes time to be aware of when you're obsessing but if you are obsessing that's a good sign that you may be performing a compulsion when doing these things.
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