Scrupulosity

I am a Christian with OCD too. I know that God is in the process of creating me and I have found it to be comforting that if he has allowed OCD to be part of my life than he will help me. So far I am able to be ok and I do exposures for other OCD events.

Hey! I’m a Christian with scrupulosity and trust me, you and I are not the first or last to have it either. I can absolutely relate. I find Non Engagement responses help a lot! https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/how-do-i-stop-thinking-about-this-what-to-do-when-youre-stuck-playing-mental-ping-pong/ For instance, early on in exposure and response prevention (ERP), I would be worried that what if I actually harmed this person or what if I actually really love this person, what if I did this sin, etc and my therapist and I would just follow my fear to its end which was always me in hell and imagining what that would be like and just sitting in the very uncomfortable thought. Working on breathing and resisting my mental compulsions to pray, confess, Chant, thought replace, etc. over time you kind of get so use to the uncertainty and not knowing that you just become numb a bit and your able to move on. The thing that NOCD helped me with was that no amount of rumination would ever give me the certainty I was searching for. Maybe I will go to hell or maybe I won’t, either way God is good and I trust that he’ll do what’s right. Then I go on and force myself to do another activity. Something my OCD tells me I can’t do like play with my niece or have some chocolate cake lol I really liked these testimonies also: https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/44590173/colts-braden-smith-details-struggle-recovery-severe-ocd https://www.premierchristianity.com/real-life/im-a-christian-with-ocd-this-is-my-story/6129.article

I don't recall thinking about death at all or having fear about it before OCD. I think I was doing ok with it until triggered recently. I know God understands OCD and what I am going through. Having said that, I don't want to use prayer as a compulsion but we are told as Christians to go to God with prayer. I think it all comes back to having doubts about being saved. If I didn't have that doubt then I wouldn't fear death as much.

I am Christian & believe I have had scrupulosity. I have struggled with the idea of faith, being saved, imposter syndrome. I went down a rabbit hole on being double minded. I have heard the OCD thought called a sticking thought. & in recovery I have gotten past a few other sticking thoughts in the past. One thing that helped me was to know doubt can be a normal thing in my faith. & to know it could be my OCD that is causing the anxiety & negative thinking. I have been learning about OCD which has also helped me to accept the thought as just a thought. I have been working on my identity in Christ & that seems to help too.