Real Event OCD

First of all, sleeping with a trans woman does not make you gay, regardless of what others think. Also, trans individuals don't really have an obligation to share their biological sex before doing so. If you felt uncomfortable because of something like genital preference then you could have just respectfully said no, but I don't see why she would have to put herself in a position of danger (trans people face extreme violence) if she doesn't even know your concern. I don't think either of you are at fault. Exposure can look like just meeting with women as normal. If the same scenario happens again then you can just respectfully remove yourself from the situation. You have no obligation whatsoever to tell other people about your sexual experiences so I hope that this doesn't continue to feel like a huge secret for you.

Transwomen are women and if people think you're gay then that's on them

hey divas-this comment section is a bit of a mess-I will say that ocd can distort people’s intentions-the woman may not be confortable telling you she isn’t cis, and that doesn’t make her less of a woman if you thought she was a woman. I understand the discomfort you may be in but you have to think to yourself “oh well so people think I’m gay” and even if the worst possible outcome happens, you would deal with it. I hope this helps, and it’s a complicated situation given how rampant queer phobia is in society atm. I hope this helps and I know you aren’t trying to be malicious, but ocd can latch onto things that are taboo. I would say try not to figure out whether or not you’re gay, because ultimately you can move on without fixating and obsessing over whether or not the woman lied to you. I hope this helps :)