I’m having some trouble; I just found the perfect apartment near my school and I went to speak with the company about signing a lease. I had a huge fear that what if my roommate is gay because I am dealing with HOCD. And guess what I find out today.. she’s lesbian. And I have nothing against gay/lesbian but my HOCD is starting to flare up again and part of me doesn’t care but part of me is worried :/ what do I do? I feel like God is trying to mess with me and I’m not okay with challenges like this. It’s the perfect location and apartment and now I’m thinking of looking elsewhere..

Username: shishishishi

Date posted: 6y ago

It could be great exposure. But in all situations if you feel your health is at risk and you have to make the right decision for your health. I’m sure she wouldn’t want to feel like she has to be limited or worry about being herself in her own home either. It’s something that’s usually on our mind outside of our homes. Needs to be a safe space for both of you.

Username: WorriedDriverWorriedDriver

Date posted: 6y ago

Yes your OCD is going to use it as a trigger but the good news is that you get to decide how to react when it says things to you!!! I would take the apartment if you are in professional ERP therapy. If you’re only doing self counseling maybe this is not the time to try to tackle this challenge.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 6y ago

I am seeking professional help, thankfully! A few months ago I would be over analyzing this over and over again thinking if this is a “sign” form God or not. Now it is VERY minimal analyzing but I’m still worried. I’m currently looking at other places because I need a back up plan. If I can find a better option, I would not take this place. But this is like the exact place I want to be at! I am struggling..

Username: 08230823

Date posted: 6y ago

I think that if you want the apartment, go for it. Show OCD that it can try to tell you what to do, but ultimately you are in control. Don’t let it keep you from being happy at an apartment you would definitely go for if OCD wasn’t an issue. It is up to you though, and if you feel uncomfortable you can choose not to live there. But it seems to me like you love the place and I don’t think you should let OCD get in the way of that. Stay strong!

Username: Philippians4:7Philippians4:7

Date posted: 6y ago

There's no confusion in God and and He will never ever have plans of harming you in any way. You thinking that God is sending you signs that your intrusive thoughts are true is indeed an intrusive thought itself. The reason that happened is because that's your ocd fear. The more you fear a certain obsession the more you will encounter stuff pertaining to it. Use this as exposure. You can do this

Username: BRoyTheNatural

Date posted: 5y ago

I’ve had HOCD for nearly 2 years now. For the last few months I had a pretty good handle on it. But last week it totally came back!... Except this time I am totally convinced it is real same-sex attraction and desires. This is terrible... one minute I was straight and the next, bi or gay. Like I just turned magically right like that. I don’t know if it’s real or not, because how could it be? How can you turn from straight to something else? And the worst thing is, the attraction was toward my good friend, with whom I’m rooming next year at college for freshman year! Sorry if I seem obnoxious. I cannot live like this

Sexual Orientation OCD

Username: anotherocd123

Date posted: 5y ago

Okay so I have been struggling with HOCD for so fucking long. I never felt like I had crushes on boys growing up but I wasn’t attracted to girls either (this was through 5th grade). Until 6th grade hit. I remember it like it was yesterday. I had the thought walking up the stairs and it was “You’re lesbian.” And ever since that thought was there and I fought it I have been dealing with all types of OCD ever since (been going on for 7 years). And only this year I found it was OCD. But it’s hard because I don’t know if I’m actually gay or I convinced myself I’m gay because I gave up and gave in. Now whenever I see I pretty girl I feel tingling. And I wanted to prove to myself that I wasn’t a lesbian so I look up pretty pictures of girls with their boobs out and I loved it. And I wanna make out with a girl so intensely. But then at the same I don’t wanna be in a relationship with a girl and I wanna marry a guy and I just desperately wanted to be like by a guy. But I get so horny whenever girls are in bikinis and stuff. But I have OCD and I’m so confused.

Username: anotherocd123

Date posted: 5y ago

Please help! I’m so scared right now. I have have HOCD for the last 7 years and I got so scared that I might be lesbian. And then when I started looking up pictures of girls I felt groinal urges and I listened to them and I liked it. I am scared that I am gay. But what terrifies me even more is that I acted on HOCD and I’m scared I might act on my harm OCD in the future. I’m terrified and I want to curl up in a ball and cry. Also I don’t want to be gay because I’m religious, but I’m worried I convinced myself I’m gay but idek.

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