Real event ocd, feeling irredeemable

I understand, I do too

I have struggled with feeling that way, definitely! I'm 34 & still struggle with a decision I made when I was 16 (oddly enough, the decision was heavily influenced by high anxiety about it doing the wrong thing... so I did what I felt was right... only to later regret it). I also regret a lot of stuff I did as a teen that weren't influenced by OCD. I always just try to have compassion and grace for myself & try not to let the guilt & shame overtake me. I encourage you to do the same!

friend you are NOT alone, this is my current spiral. i feel so seen by your posts, i feel a lot of shame and guilt for decisions i made in the past 3 or so years. i find myself so absolutely desperate for a redo and even feeling envious of people who are younger cause i tell myself “life would be so much different if i could go back” and feeling the same exact way about other people. I don’t know them or their story at ALL, but i find myself wishing I was them instead. real event OCD is horrible and has robbed my sunshine genuinely, i just recently started meds and i do have to say going to therapy is such a life changer. i’ve made mistakes too friend.

I’m 65 and still have deep regrets for some of the wrongs I did as a teenager — things I believe may have actually ruined other people’s lives forever. I can still get terrorized by thoughts of these things coming to light even decades later and being dragged off to prison. I’ve been told by therapists that much of these amount to nothing more than pretty common adolescent experiences, just fairly normal teenage experimentation. Why can’t I just accept that, forgive myself, and let these things go? I’ve been trying to do so for years and years - but the wounds feel as fresh as when was a kid.