Is this undiagnosed relationship anxiety, or does it mean I’m truly not attracted enough?

@ltbxnsr Oops got cut off. it is not urgent, nor is it secret intuition. It’s ok to be unsure about a partner. It sucks and it’s scary but i’ve found that the only thing that helps is thinking “there is time. nothing needs to be done right now”

@ltbxnsr I’m really grateful for your message, not because I’m looking for reassurance, but because it’s comforting to hear a different perspective from someone who doesn’t have a diagnosis either. It gives me something to think about. If you don’t mind me asking, what did kissing feel like for you?

@Anonymous I’m so glad to know I’m not going crazy because of this. It’s honestly really, really hard, and I hope we both get some clarity about our feelings or at least find the peace of mind we need. Would you mind me asking how long you’ve been together?

@Anonyymmm200737373 Only 2 months but it starts immediately with anyone ive ever been interested in lmao. It has gotten better significantly and i’ll have moments when i do actually want to kiss him and enjoy it but it is very subtle still and it takes a lot of energy rn, but i believe i am starting to catch feelings but it varies and is very confusing to me too. It rly feels like ur going a little crazy haha. Sometimes i also find myself seeing other guys and question if mine is attractive enough etc but ik it’s ok to think that. How long havs u been with ur partner?

@Anonyymmm200737373 I’ll say tho that taking actions is far a better tell of what it makes you feel than trying to think about how u feel, cuz that for me anyway is usually impossible to decipher atm haha. So whether u buy them flowers, or ask for/give them a hug, sending them a sweet text without thinking about how u “should” feel or want to feel and just pulling the trigger on it asap has helped me tons. Sometimes it feels “fake/forced/lying” so i sympathize but ive gotten enough positive hits and moments to know i like him enough to see him again if that helps? Not worrying about if he’s the one but simply “am i willing to see them again?”

@Anonymous Thank you so much for your perspective and advice. I’m really trying to put it into practice, and it makes a lot of sense to focus on the present moment instead of constantly analyzing everything. After all, neither overthinking nor fear will tell us what will happen in the future or how we’ll feel in the coming weeks, months, and beyond. It’s definitely easier said than done, but I’m doing my best. Thank you again, and I’m sending you lots of love.

@Anonymous Sometimes I realize that I’m not really listening and seem very absent because I’m so focused on what I’m feeling. The symptom that bothers me most is a lump-in-the-throat sensation. I become so focused on it that my mind immediately starts telling me things like, “You’re not attracted to him,” “He’s not good for you,” and so on. Then I stop paying attention to what my partner is saying and struggle to enjoy things, even during good moments.