dealing with real events

I have experienced this. It’s actually real hard and I haven’t found a tool that helps too much with real events. I try to focus on my actions now rather than in the past.

I will copy over a message I left on another post of what has been helping me lately: hi friend, something that’s been helping me lately has been looking back and thinking ‘ i’ve learned what not to do/how not to act’ this has been helping me because its true. ive learnt what behaviour i will never repeat and how it makes me feel but i am not going to let it define me. I like this because it takes accountability for doing something bad, but also allows you to compartmentalise it and put it in a box and say okay I can move on from this. Guaranteed with OCD, it’s not easy to just move on but having these rational thoughts helps. another thing that helps me is to not reassurance seek as much as possible. I have a really bad habit of asking ChatGPT about past events and confessing it to them and when I don’t do this, I’m generally happier. Another thing that’s been helping me cope is sitting with the discomfort even when it’s there and not engaging with it as much as I normally do by distracting myself with something. I play Minecraft so sometimes I’ll distract myself with that but also crafting painting or music or doing a job or chore around the house is another good distraction. I also try to view my real event OCD as similar to my previous OCD spirals (for example health OCD). obviously with real event its hard because when you try to view it as the same as other themes OCD says ‘no but something actually happened’. However, thinking to myself ‘hold on you’ve been here before and you got out of it- and it felt the same level of urgent and distressing before is also helpful bc it reminds you that even though yes something you regret did happen, its still OCD making it feel like the end of the world. The final thing I’ve been doing is trying to lean on this community and people who have experienced similar things to me rather than googling or asking for reassurance from AI. ❤️❤️ (edited)

I am curious of this too though on coping or solutions. I have harmful ocd, relationship ocd, real events ocd, and probably others. I have regrets and guilt from events that I constantly replay in my head, rationalize, decipher, which begets anxiety and guilt with more anxiety. I resist the urge to confess. I also have graphic thoughts of harming my spouse, or what if I did this, or what if I did that, how would my dog react. What if I want to hurt my spouse or my dog. I sometimes feel like ‘if they knew the ‘real’ me they wouldn’t love me’, and then sometimes I feel like an imposter or like I don’t belong where I’m at. Like I am faking my emotions, my marriage, etc. A whole whirlwind.