So I have a question for everyone in here I want to as clearly as I can describe my harm OCD including my obsessions, spikes, and compulsions and I want to see if anyone in here can relate to my experience. It’s bizarre for sure just to let you all know. So my obsession is that I will harm everyone I encounter when I’m out in public, including people I just randomly walk by in the store and or elsewhere. Even if I’m just sitting in my car parked and seeing people walk by outside my car. When I physically look at them my spike immediately occurs and most of the time it is an 8 or 10 out 10 intensity level. Next is my compulsion. So what I do for my compulsion is I have to keep physically looking at them either for a few seconds or until they walk out of site. By doing this I’m assuring myself that I couldn’t have done anything to them because I see them walking away and their just fine. It’s just so exhausting and repetitive. This specific theme has been going on strong now for at least a year and a half and I just can’t shake it. Any help or ideas or similar experiences would be greatly helpful. Thanks!

I’ve always had OCD, and for most of my life it was little things that seemed manageable at the time or something that would phase out of my head within a couple days/weeks/months. But, the older I got the more severe it became, I’d find myself collapsing deeper and deeper within my own head trying to out think the thoughts that bothered me. About a year ago I had a thought that rattled me to my core. My brothers and I were watching a movie in our mother’s room when my youngest brother turned to me to say something. His close proximity to me triggered a fleeting sexually explicit image in my head and that thought caused me to spiral. Asking questions like, “are you attracted to your minor brother? Are you attracted to minors? Are you gay? Etc.” a couple days went by and my mental stability continued to crumble until I broke down to my mother, she was understanding and we found a a psychiatrist. I got on medication and for a while everything was slowly but surely trending in a positive direction. The thoughts would still pop into my head but they were becoming more manageable. As we all know OCD and mental illness comes in waves. Currently my OCD has been pretty severe. I feel those intrusive thoughts latching on in my head and it’s been very hard to kick them. It’s gotten to the point where I find myself being uncomfortable being in close proximity with my little brother because I feel as though I am capable of harming him in any way. And the more uncomfortable I become being around him the more I find myself lashing out in anger towards the people I care about the most. Those moments of anger cause me to spiral even farther as my head fills with ideas like “what if you are capable of hurting someone or even murdering them?” There’s times where these thoughts rattle me so much that I feel like it would be better to be in prison where I couldn’t harm someone or that even being dead would be a better solution than possibly running the risk of hurting someone in my life I care about. This is about the jist of it, a majority of the OCD I have is centered around the idea that I am capable of harming my little brother physically, mentally, sexually. It’s been exhausting and it feels like there is no end in sight.

i’m back in a cycle of having harm related OCD thoughts and feelings and urges and i get these episodes where it’s like i’m disassociating and feel like i’m about to snap and go crazy violent. does anyone else experience this? i need help

Anyone experience this? I have had OCD for past 9 years, over the course of that time I have had multiple themes from POCD, false memory OCD, contamination OCD the list goes on. Right now I am struggling with the thought that an ex is going to harm me, my family and fiancé. I am about to get married and my fiancé makes me so happy I am in love and finally found the person that truly completes me. However, of course OCD latched onto that. My OCD convinces me that if my ex finds out I’m going to get married that he will harm me and my family. The other day I did a compulsion and looked at my blocked list which my ex and his family and friends are on, I quickly glanced at their little profile pics to make sure they were okay and that they weren’t planning on scheming to harm me and my family and my fiancé. Immediately after I did this I started to freak out, my OCD made me think I was a cheater and that I secretly want to reach out to this ex. I was recently diagnosed with PTSD from that situation because I went through a traumatic experience with this individual and this is what had lead me to believe that he will harm me. Anyone else experience similar?