Fear of d*ing

I can’t even type the word without freaking out. I’ve had different ocd habits but this is a new one for me. I had surgery for appendicitis. It was one of the freakiest days of my life. appendicitis is a common surgery so I was completely fine afterwards. But that day I was convinced I wasn’t gonna be okay. The surgery went well and I was able to go home the same day I felt calm after. Fast forward a couple days later I started having chest pains I went back to the hospital I had convinced myself again I wasn’t gonna be okay. they did a ct scan blood test ekg they all came back normal. I waited 8 hours for them to tell me it’s anxiety. Anxiety and ocd. Now I almost constantly feel like I have to check in with myself to make sure I’m healthy. And I fixate over making the “right choice” like “dont touch this object with your right hand otherwise something negative will happen” things like that, that make me feel like everything I do will cause a butterfly effect/the ocd talking, so I have to make sure it’s the correct action. I have these thoughts throughout the day and it’s been so exhausting like I can’t make a decision without feeling like it’s the wrong one. I’ve noticed it’s made me feel so hopeless. At night it feels hard to breath because I get panic attacks and that freaks me out but then it goes away and I can breathe norm again. But this constant feeling of uncertainty and anxiety exhaustion from compulsions just makes me feel hopeless. I’ve been able to get myself out of ocd habits in the past, this current one has just been so heavy