New relationship ROCD

My boyfriend and I told each other we love each other for the first time a couple days ago. It was such a happy night and I felt like I was on top of the world. I haven’t seen him since bc due to our schedules and distance we can only usually see each other roughly once a week but we usually text each other here and there throughout the days while we’re apart. I wish I could just be with him all the time because that’s the only time I feel reassured and comfortable. The more time we spend apart the less sure I get and the more I start to ruminate. Did he mean what he said? Did I mean it? I get scared that he’s just saying it because it feels like the next step in the relationship and not because he actually means it. Or that we only think we’re in love but this isn’t really what love is. I try to get in his head and see myself through his eyes to see if he actually loves me or not. If I come to the conclusion that he does then I can relax for a little bit but then eventually the fear will come back again soon. I’m also scared that he’s not the one, and that I’m falling for a guy that’s going to eventually break my heart. I get scared that he’ll cheat on me with his friend from his grad program who is always texting and calling him and is known to be kind of promiscuous. I trust he’s not interested in her but I feel like she might be interested in him but it’s hard to know for sure because I only briefly met her once. I feel such a high when I see that he’s texted me. It’s such a warm feeling and a reminder that he still likes me, but neither of us are very frequent texters bc we can both be busy so the longer I wait to hear from him the more convinced I get that he’s changed his mind about me. The fear does feel less intense these days compared to a few months ago when things were newer, I think I am slowly starting to trust him, but I do still ruminate all the time even if it doesn’t feel as urgent. My family has been asking me a lot about him and the nature of our relationship recently and that’s been triggering. I also get triggered when people say how good looking he is because it makes me scared of all the attention he’s going to get from other women. I’m not proud of these thoughts bc I know they read as jealous and insecure, and I try so hard to not let them show. I don’t even know if this is ocd or just regular anxiety, I haven’t gotten a diagnosis yet, but my brain keeps telling me I’m lying to myself whenever I feel convinced it’s ocd. Ugh, I’m just so tired of expending all my mental energy on this. I wish I could just live my life without constantly worrying if I’m living it the right way and making the right decisions.