Can doubts happen every day for months? (ROCD)

@Anonymous Wow, that’s so wonderful to hear. I truly wish you both all the best, and thank you for sharing your experience.

@anca Excellent point about context! Not to mention, it’s still possible for women to doubt to land on still being straight! Or at least a preference for heterosexual relationships. That’s where we really can’t look to the internet for an answer about this stuff. No one can tell you who you are, OCD or not!

@Cat-Mom Yes for sure. The internet usually lacks nuance on a lot of things and most times the comments on these posts confirm your fears because they come from people who relate, whereas there may be a lot of people like you and me who are not taking part in the conversation. I've been trying to remind myself that lately

@anca Thank you, I really appreciate your reply. You’re right, living with uncertainty is incredibly difficult, especially knowing that nothing can ever be 100% certain. My biggest struggle is that I’ve never been diagnosed with ROCD. I only suspect it because in my previous relationship, after about three years together, I suddenly felt like I didn’t love my partner anymore. Those thoughts distressed me almost every day for the next two years. In the end, the relationship ended because of other fundamental incompatibilities, not because of those thoughts. Before entering my current relationship, I was already afraid the same thing would happen again, and it did (just with other doubts and physical symptoms). I talked to my therapist about it back then, but she saw it as normal intrusive thoughts that everyone has or said they could simply reflect the truth. What triggers me the most is the thought: “You don’t have an ROCD diagnosis, so maybe it’s just the truth.” Especially because these thoughts are there every day and they make me feel sad and overwhelmed.

@Anonyymmm200737373 I’m obviously not a psychiatrist or therapist, but I will say not all of them may catch OCD. I was told by one therapist that I did not appear obsessive-compulsive, and the other one I saw felt it was obvious that I had the symptoms, and the DOCs indicated a high score as well. I’d say like with anything you want to be heard out on, maybe try another therapist/psychiatrist who specializes in OCD and explain your experience! Having thoughts that make you sad and overwhelmed every day is not something we should overlook in any sense

@Cat-Mom That’s exactly why it’s driving me so crazy. Because I keep thinking that if I ended this relationship, all of this mental torture would just stop and I’d finally be free. But that’s not what I actually want. I just want some peace, and I’m scared that I’ll never have that peace while I’m with this person. And that brings us back to the uncertainty again. That’s what I’m really afraid of, and it’s what’s stressing me out so much.

@Anonyymmm200737373 I don't have an official diagnosis either and I've had those thoughts too, that my thoughts are telling the truth. I feel like with rocd it's probably harder to tell on your own because your experience may sound similar to people who have normal relationship doubts but if your doubts are persistent and urgent and you feel the need to ruminate about it until you feel some sort of relief it's definetly worth looking into again with another therapist. For me it was a bit easier to tell that I have it because I've experienced many themes throughout my life that have disturbed me and I did talk to a therapist and she confirmed that they are ocd symptoms but it wasnt a formal assesment so I don't have an actual diagnosis. Ocd is often misdiagnosed by regular therapists so definetly look for a therapist specialized in ocd

@anca Thank you so much. I’ll take your advice and try to find a new therapist to get a other perspective 🙏🏻