Is this OCD or just me ‼️‼️

7/27 - feel back into the daydreaming 2-3 days in a row - Brought intrusive thought back knowing it most likely would cause now I’m in a little fear God will punish me cause I felt conviction and ignored it and was like I’ll ask for forgiveness later and I did. I feel I needed to get the daydream out of my system and it felt good and made me happy. - It’s easy for me to not think and I like try to cancel them out and I’m like oh AI told me this and I feel like I’m applying it to everything that is going on or it gives me reassurance to be like oh okay the reason that happened is because of mental checking, etc. - I am putting pressure on myself not God. I continuously pray asking for forgiveness I give into the daydreaming so insanely easily even when I feel conviction. I also am like I can ask God for forgiveness later and do ask for forgiveness and I feel so happy in the moment daydreaming but it takes away from reality. Am I actually forgiven though? - It is also for me to think normally and daydreaming and thinking of scenarios is so easy for me, but then I’m like oh wait I should be thinking bad things so it’s like I remind myself. - It’s like I feel excitement for the thoughts to come back. Like I’ll look forward to watching a movie in bed and be like “oh I’ll think the bad thoughts when I’m in bed watching the show!“ but when I do get the thoughts I look past them or ask God for forgiveness. - it’s like I get a bad idea of a thought in my head and I’ll be like “oh let me think this bad thought and form it” and then I’ll try to not think it and be moving around to try to stop it from forming. Sometimes I feel the urge to think it and sometimes I don’t and it’s just like I need to stop thinking and then I do stop thinking and then I’m able to be in reality. - I just need to be focused solely on what is in front of me and then the thoughts don’t happen and if they do I look past it but they only stay for like 2 seconds and then I blink and am in the present. I think I am genuinely just getting in my head like I am doing all of these bad thoughts cause when I laugh or something or make a funny face which is what I do to cancel out or a thought or is just a genuine reaction to a tv show or something I made it a few times and I’m just like wait that was me like I just need to stop thinking and just stay focused on what is in front of me if that makes sense

Anonymous

Date posted: 7h

Have you looked into scrupulosity?

Anonymous

Date posted: 7h

@Anonymous I told my therapist about it and she said I don’t have that but I think I might do lol. Is all of this OCD you think or am I insane

Anonymous

Date posted: 7h

@Anonymous I can't really tell you if it's OCD or not, but something my therapist told me to help me tell if something is OCD is if it feels excessive. From what youve said, it does sound excessive and like it's taking over your life. I don't have the same triggers, but I know that feeling. We aren't insane. It's a mental illness for a reason: it is an illness that can sometimes be debilitating.

Anonymous

Date posted: 6h

@Anonymous It happens to me all the time. My therapist says it’s OCD and I’m getting tested for it soon. I kind of want it to be OCD just cause I don’t want these things to be from me personally or maybe it’s just hormones or something idk. I just don’t wanna be some psychopath who thinks disturbing things. Like my mind is completely blank right now no thoughts or anything

Anonymous

Date posted: 6h

@Anonymous So I think it might just be me.

Anonymous

Date posted: 6h

@Anonymous Even people without OCD have intrusive and disturbing thoughts. With OCD, it seems like often it tries to question what we value most. And it's normal to go through different states of being.

Anonymous

Date posted: 6h

@Anonymous - This all also started around the time when I started my walk with Christ and stopped maldapative daydreaming. I have a very picturesque imagination.

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