- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
??
- Date posted
- 5y
You are so strong and don’t ever forget it. I have struggled with OCD my whole life and I have the same problem but with blowing out my candles. I’m still learning myself how to not overthinking as much, but I just wanted to let you know you are never alone even if it feels like it!
- Date posted
- 5y
We’re in this together!!!! We will find ways to over come this because we are stronger than our OCD!
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi Stephanie , I’m at a similar point and honestly it’s hard right now, I’ve lost my job and other things because of this but I’ve noticed mediation has really been a tool for me as of recent I’m still recovering and definitely going thru it But not seeking reassurance and mediation are really getting me thru You got this your not alone !!
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you for that! When I’m the last one to leave my job, it’ll take me a half hour to make sure the doors are locked and the faucets are off and that nothings going to cause a fire. I’ve driven home before only to drive right back because my brain won’t stop saying “You didn’t lock the door. You didn’t turn the space heater off” even though i know for sure i did. I need to do something to take control of this! Things will get better for you, as I know they will for me too. We got this!
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi! I have very different manifestations that yours in that mine are mostly mental, but I think hearing from people with other kinds of ocd helps sometimes when trying to navigate your own type. When I was little a lot of my fears were about contamination and germs, but as I got older I started becoming afraid of things other people couldn’t see. One of the biggest was whether or not I would go out of control and kill myself or hurt others. I would hide belts and coat hangers because I was afraid that I would get up in the middle of the night and hang myself. I would make sure I was tucked deep into my bed each time I went to sleep. I was also afraid of hell. I was afraid that god could see these horrible suicidal-like thoughts and banish me from heaven (my family was catholic growing up, so suicide is a big no no on the heaven requirements). I started praying every night. I started having a mental rubric for my prayers. I had to say what I was sorry for every night and I had to repent. Guilt began to center my obsessions. I was obsessed with being evil. I thought I was worthless. I was afraid that god would never accept me because of the things I thought about. So in my late teens, I began to punish myself. I would take my nails and scratch into my skin. Eventually this became me using the key to my dorm room as a weapon against myself every time I messed up. I had to be punished for everything. I’m still struggling with that one today, and I’m not perfect, but I have a wonderful boyfriend and family there behind me. What helped me most was accepting the things I was most afraid of. For example, I had bad ocd about being gay for a while. I told myself eventually, so what if I am? Why does it matter? I surrounded myself and exposed myself to people who actually had that identity and realized 1) I was VERY not gay and 2) being gay was, not bad at all. The biggest piece of advice I can give is try to allow those obsessions to exist and not respond to them. Think, so what if the door is unlocked? (Easier said than done I realize). My approach is usually apathetic humor, which sometimes can take the strength out of some of my terrors. I hope you are able to get better! I’m rooting for you.
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m so glad you have great people beside you to help guide you through this. I don’t think most people realize just how serious OCD actually is. I’m going to start trying to tell myself after doing my nightly rituals ONCE that yes, the door is locked, the faucets are off, the stove is off, and there is no reason to get up and check anything again. My anxiety will be through the roof for the first couple of weeks but hopefully it’ll eventually ease up. Thank you so much for the advice. I’m rooting for you as well <3
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- 5y
@stephanie95 I’m proud of you girl! You got this!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hiii! This is my first post. I found NOCD through a tiktok ad that spoke to me. It was titled signs you didnt know were OCD or something like that, and one of the slides was “checking my pulse throughout the day to make sure i was okay”. This is something ive done for i dont even know how long. atleast 10 years, im 24 now. Ive always known Ive had OCD. Light Sanitation OCD runs in my family. But over the years ive started to realize i had way more than the “family trait”. Checking my pulse 40+ times a day is something i refer to as my “OCD tick”. Its to the point where people who dont know about my “tick” often ask if i am okay when they see me do it. Maybe this post is me putting it on paper for the first time so i myself can analyze but some other stuff i struggle with are: Often having thoughts of if i dont do A, B will happen. An example that is common for me is “if i dont refold this shirt me and my boyfriend will get into an argument” or if im out to dinner with a friend, “if i dont pick up this cup and place it back down, i will get into a car accident on the way home”. This is one i struggle with almost everyday, especially when im around people (work or outings). This compulsion happens multiple times a day. Now in my life i try to practice exposure therapy, even getting annoyed i feel the compulsion and think to myself “oh my god this is so stupid no!” but if i dont follow through i feel guilty. often when i get my next compulsion shortly after i tell myself “okay doing this will make up for not doing the previous one”. I definitely dont have a number based OCD, but i would have to pick up and put down the cup until it feels “right” or “correct”- same with checking my pulse. I have to check my pulse until the feeling is “just right”. With sanitation as i said before, i have a very clean and sanitary family, although mine is more severe than their feelings. I avoid touching certain surfaces after i have washed my hands, such as the front door knob, or living room tv remote, etc. If i need to touch or use these things, i have to immediately wash my hands again. Even if someone comes home and asks me to go and lock the front door ill often respond with “i cant i just washed my hands, if i lock the door ill have to rewash my hands”. thankfully my family is very understanding. I often feel like certain things are contaminated. For example when i come home i sanitize my phone immediately as it is contaminated from being outside of my house. I often have a feeling of something having to feel “just right”. If i go out to dinner i have to be the first to pick what seat or side of the booth im sitting on before the rest of my family sits down or i will feel anxious the whole dinner. Sometimes when im typing i have to back space and retype the same word over and over until i feel i typed it “just right”- even if i didnt make a typo. sometimes when i am driving and space out i often think “oh my god did i just hit someone” when there is no evidence that i have. it worries me. I think oh my god i mightve done a hit and run. But tell myself it can not be possible, theres no police chasing me, no honking, or anything. It is scary. this one is very rare. once in a blue moon i get a false memory. A main one ive felt since i was a kid is if someone or some object touches any part of my body, for example my left arm, i have to have them or atleast my self touch my right arm in the exact same way or i feel uneasy. this isnt with every single touch, but mainly when i feel triggered- although i never know what triggers a moment where i need the symmetry. I guess ive always known, i am very honest with my family, friends, and boyfriend about it. But i didnt start to realize how neurodivergent i was until asking some friends “you never randomly feel *insert compulsion*?” and they say never in their life have they felt like that. Im very self aware and have come to an acceptance with all these things, although it is debilitating. Periodically i think, wow it must be nice to not live life with these feelings but oh well. To be honest, downloading this app is the first step ive ever taken to find out more about OCD. Ive always kind of just been like “yeah i definitely have OCD but okay” more or less.
- Date posted
- 14w
Hello! I’m new here. Unfortunately I’m not able to afford a therapist but I’ve been doing a lot of research and I think a lot of my symptoms/thoughts align with OCD. I want to share some of what I experience and see if anyone else experiences the same and what resources helped you. I think I mostly experience contamination OCD. I’m constantly worried that something I do/touch is going to make me really sick and/or die. Especially with food, I’m constantly worried that I’ll accidentally have something on my hands when I eat, then I’ll touch the food and get that on the food, eat it and get sick. So I’ll wash my hands every time my hands touch any little tiny thing again and again before I eat, same with any forks/spoons, or I’ll even think I touched cleaner a few hours ago and I’ve washed my hands several times since then and I just washed them again but they still feel dirty so even if impractical I’ll use a fork and if my hands touch the part of the fork that touches the food then I can’t eat the food any longer or use that fork. Also at work I have these thoughts that I know are ridiculous but also give me very real anxiety. Like “if I don’t finish this order before that machine beeps its a sign I’m going to die” and then I have to rush to make sure I finish fast and then I’ll be like ok that’s so stressful I’m not going to think like that any more it’s ridiculous but then the thoughts keep coming back so I have to keep rushing. This is just a little tad bit of what I experience and I would love to hear from others as I haven’t met anyone else like me before. Thank you!
- Date posted
- 14w
I’m new to NOCD and just wanted to share my experience to see if anyone else can relate or has any thoughts or advice. My thing is needing a system or some kind of digitally saved reference (online article/notes app) to make decisions on how to live my life and spend my time- then I get super caught up in what is the objectively “right” system to have which never really leads anywhere- over the last 6+ years I’ve probably changed this system over 100 times because at some point I realized it wasn’t “right”. At best, I stick with a system for months and be pretty free from OCD but at worst I can go months where I only experience intermittent periods of living free from OCD and spend hours and hours putting my life on hold trying to figure out what the right system is or to answer and figure out impossible answers to completely subjective things. I get a lot of regret over all the time and life I’ve wasted in this cycle, and feel kinda like everything I’ve done in previous systems was “wrong” so I try to fix that by undoing some of those actions. I think part of the root of this is wanting to control so many parts of my life and the fact that there are other parts of life I could be experiencing, ways I could be improving, and that there is so much out there that I could never ever do or experience all of it leads me to try to figure out some system that gives me a better feeling of control over this. If anyone reads all this that’s awesome- lmk if this resonates with you at all
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