I’m trying to figure out if mine was a result of perimenopause or something else that couldn’t triggered it, as I’m 37 years old and was fairly happy at the time of onset. Did anyone else have a similar experience? From 0 to 100, basically overnight? Or onset later in life like mine?
Mine was very much overnight! It hit postpartum. So it was like a light switch
@JM93 This breaks my heart 😕 I really wanted to try for kids this year and then this OCD happened. And now I’m terrified that pregnancy hormones will make it even worse. Plus I can barely take care of myself right now, let alone a child. It completely derailed my life plans.
@Alanka To encourage you-even on my toughest OCD days I would never take back being a mom for anything. And I deal with debilitating harm OCD that targets my 2 children. There is help out there. And so many of us have been exactly where you are. There are so many of us moms with OCD. Whatever you choose will be the right choice. But don’t let OCD take away your choices. Praying for you 💙
@JM93 Me too. Unreal. I don’t even feel like myself, but glad I am getting help.
Yes! I was obsessing over things that I did when I was a teenager where shame and guilt played a big part. All of sudden I had a really bad intrusive thought (of a thought), I had once! I felt such trauma, like what kind of person am I to have had that thought when I didn’t have OCD at the time of the original thought. My mind has a way of remembering things I thought that at the time didn’t bother me, but the onset of the OCD made me feel like I was living in a nightmare and scarier than I have ever felt in my life. I was 24 at the time of onset. Hang in there. Basically, I had a good life prior.
Almost overnight for me but I was still in high school
@sick&tired Did you try to find a root cause or just accepted it?
@Alanka I’ve been told about PANDAS, and I actually did get strep throat multiple times as a kid, but I don’t remember if I had strep right before the onset of my OCD. https://kids.iocdf.org/professionals/md/pandas/ But at the time I was getting ready to apply to university and I remember that’s when a lot of the moral scrupulosity started because I would question if I was telling the truth and if I actually deserved all my accomplishments, etc. Idk, but all I know is my brain has never worked the same way again. Like someone flipped a switch and there was very clearly life before OCD and after. I was always anxious as a kid (and recently diagnosed with autism and adhd as well), but this was something completely different. Personally I’ve always focused more on how to manage it vs. how/why it happened. I think it also runs in the family, but mental illness is not really taken seriously in my community, especially back then.
@sick&tired I’m so sorry 😞 💔 I’m so hoping my brain will go back to the way it was but hearing everyone’s stories, that doesn’t seem to be the case.
@Alanka I’m sorry I don’t mean to scare you. If it makes you feel any better I’m about your age now. I was still able to graduate from university, travel the world, etc. It’s an awful condition, true. But it is manageable. You can still live a big, beautiful life with OCD. And there’s lots of tools to combat it. Keep fighting for your dream life. 🩷
@sick&tired Thank you. I’m happy to hear you’re still living life. I’m new to this and grieving, so very much in the “my life is ruined” stage of this journey
@Alanka You’re allowed to grieve. I still grieve the painful past. I grieve the version of myself that was so insecure and full of OCD doubt that people took advantage of/hurt me. I grieve the life I thought I’d have. It’s a lot. Just don’t give up. 🩷 Life may look different, but it’s still yours and you get to experiment as many times as you’d like!
For me it came on gradually over the course of a few years, then I suffered a traumatic event and it became very very severe very fast. But I have heard that for many people it was like "a flip switched" out of nowhere. Periods of life where there are big hormone changes are definitely a risk factor, albeit not the only risk factor.
@Mercury75 Did you ever get it under control from it being very very severe
@Alanka Oh yeah! It's more in the mild-moderate range now, and has been for many years. More of a mosquito than a raging tsunami haha. Still annoying and frustrating sometimes, but not threatening or scary like it used to be!
@Mercury75 Some people even get to where they no longer meet the diagnostic criteria at all anymore. I may not be there but it still feels pretty peaceful in my mind after what I've been through. I wish you well on your recovery ❤️
@Mercury75 Omg dude how. I feel like I’m at the point where I don’t even wanna live anymore. And I’m only 4 months in 🥺
YES I woke up on feb 15, 2020 and for about a year I was at about a level 1000
@Justmesadly Breaks my heart hearing these stories because I feel the pain. I’m at month 4 and can’t imagine 6 more months of being at 1000. I What helped you?
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