There’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
For myself, I always got this confused with having a high sex drive. But it seems OCD is what likely makes the thoughts so persistent. I find it helpful to keep track of how often it happens so I can take a numbers based approach to my partner if I need to explain myself.
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m not even really having any thoughts, I’m just paranoid because I’m feeling this way with the triggers nearby/around and it makes me feel like they’re connected even if they aren’t. And I’m sure my focusing/ruminating makes it worse. I’m just so nervous cause I feel like I want to like, experience pleasure, but I don’t if it has anything to do with my fear/thoughts.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright Yeah I think the ruminating isn’t helping you or me. Let’s not sweat it and see where that gets us.
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
@ProsperwithOCD It’s just so hard. I feel so guilty ? Hopefully some medicine and ERP will help
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright I haven’t tried ERP but from what I read it helps most people. I find keeping a pros and cons list of resisting compulsions can keep things in perspective.
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
@ProsperwithOCD That’s a great idea! Right now I’m writing down all my fears/thoughts as they occur so my therapist and I can make a plan
StefHStefH
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright and @ProsperwithOCD I think you both are on the right path to recovery and that is being able to discuss it! ERP is absolutely life changing but it is HARD! Your anxiety will shoot through the roof and I know just hearing that right there makes you want to turn the other way and run. But believe and trust me it really works. Because what it is ultimately doing is desensitizing your brain of your fear. And before you know it, the ruminating will become less and less.
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for your support. I’m so scared to start but I’m so ready to be healthy again.
StefHStefH
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright I completely understand and I have been there. I honestly treated it at times like going to the gym “oh, I’ll try tomorrow today was just too stressful”. But you said it yourself “you are ready to be healthy again” and that is amazing! That’s YOU controlling your OCD not it controlling you. For the past 6+ years mine has been all about a certain kind of contamination. So what I’m struggling with if when I feel the need to act on a compulsion I’ll say to myself “no, do the opposite, don’t give in to the obsession...” but what I’m struggling with is now it’s like my OCD out smarted that and is like “well you are trying to pick this specific time to not wash these germs because you truly want them there...” which obviously I don’t want them. But it’s how this OCD monster controls and tortures us. So always remember you will have good days and bad days. I can’t say I’m perfect and I kicked OCDs ass because honestly it’s always going to be a battle. But your need/want to “be ready to be healthy” needs to overpower this monster!
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you SO much!!! I truly needed this!! I’m trying so hard not to panic right now ? But you’re right, at the end of the day everything is happening because of this monster in my head, and I need to take the reigns back. It loves to avoid my punches and twist my words. It likes to evolve and change but it’s still just OCD. I’m doing my best! I wish you so much peace and healing.
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issphra 🫶🏻
- Date posted
- 22w
I’m freaking out please help
I don’t know if my hormones are extra wild this month or what, but I have been having so many POCD thoughts lately. It feels like I enjoy them in the moment, and then a few seconds later, I get this tiny flicker of *wait I don’t think I actually want to enjoy that.* It’s scaring me a lot. I was watching adult videos for the first time in about a year, since I had been avoiding them because of my OCD. I know they are not good for anyone, but I felt like i could (ironically it felt like a tiny win that my OCD had calmed down enough). But while watching, I had like 3 separate POCD thoughts. And it felt like I liked them. Like genuinely *liked* them. I don’t know if maybe my body was mixing up physical pleasure and mental pleasure, and then my brain inserted those not okay thoughts into the situation, which got tangled up with the pleasure responses I felt mentally and physically. It is all really confusing. I just feel so scared. I know OCD thoughts are supposed to feel real, and that once you get desensitized to the anxiety, they lose their power. But this feels like I am *actually enjoying* the thoughts, and that makes me want to cry. I’m scared that I actually like these thoughts when I’m really aroused :( Please help.
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HOY
- Date posted
- 21w
crying
Im only 20 and Ive been crying. I am not diagnosed with OCD yet but it lines up. I'm so scared its not, these physical sensations and urges are so horrible and I just wanna hide myself from this earth. It feels so real. I'd rather not feel any arousal than experience it, no matter if its something I like or not. I want to be free from this hell.
Vee <3
- Date posted
- 16w
Heyyyy!
So my OCD has been bad lately. I’ve been ruminating and obsessing over my sexuality again. And it just keeps getting worse. I hate it so much. I try to sit with the discomfort but then my ocd does the backdoor spike. And the groinal response is what keeps me looped. It SUCKS. I am not attracted to men, but my OCD is trying SO hard to convince me that I am. There have been days where I’m just so mentally exhausted that I “accept” what my ocd tells me and I just walk around a hollow, lethargic shell. But then I rethink it and I feel better. It feels like I can only find my TRUE self when I tire my nervous system out enough that it literally breaks down and has me suicidal and hopeless. And then accepting my OCD’s “truth” (that I’m attracted to men) feels like a burden and a chore. I woke up today from an OCD dream, tried to go back to sleep, and my stomach kept cramping bc I was so anxious and ruminating over my intrusive thoughts. I’m starting to doubt it being OCD anymore. My brain is too tired to fight and cry about it anymore.
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