What has ocd stopped you from doing ?

Can totally relate to that. Even when I had relationships and things like that, or when I still had a job, I was living what felt like a double life. The face I put on, to make everyone think I was normal and okay, and my inner life, which was just a battle field I had to survive each day. My life just felt like a endurance test. Not living. Surviving. Battling my own mind 24/7. And thanks, I think it does take a lot of strength to battle like that everyday. Especially when your keeping it all bottled up. But eventually even the strongest person reaches their limit. Im so grateful I did eventually get help.

@🪽AngelsWings🪽 I can only imagine how difficult that was for you. I’m so sorry :(

Yeah, same here. If I can imagine my life without ever having had ocd, and maybe, especially that theme. I wonder if id have had children. Something i will never know the answer to. I just have to accept it really. I believe you can still totally have a full life without having kids, but as I get older, I find myself reflecting on that aspect of life that passed me by. And not through choice, through illness.

@🪽AngelsWings🪽 I already experience extreme taboo and harm ocd surrounding my pets and it’s the mean reason why I finally even started therapy and NOCD after decades of knowing I had OCD. So it really has me thinking that I would have the same themes with my children. It’s horrible.

@Dianne Mae It literally latches onto what we care about the most. I dont think you get more horrible than that. Im really glad you found treatment. It can be really hard to ask for help with any of the taboo themes or harm themes. I sometimes think of all the people who never got help for whatever reasons and didnt survive it. Its one of the main reasons im so grateful I did get help. I had ocd around my pets, too. That was horrendous. 😫

@🪽AngelsWings🪽 You make a great point. We’re very lucky to have access to help and to finally have structured help too.. every time I have these flare-ups, my time wasted on compulsions is far less. And you’re right how it latches. It’s funny because if it’s any other pet I would not have any issues like suddenly doubting myself and my actions. My thoughts wouldn’t be in attack mode. But of course because I love my pets the most, my thoughts are a whirlwind everyday just trying to function around them. But I refuse to let OCD take that away from me. If I can’t be a human mother, I want to be the best cat mom ever. I can easily explain this to others and give them all the tips and reminders about combatting OCD, yet I still doubt myself and my own actions every day. The irony! 🙃

@Dianne Mae Fellow cat mum here 🐈🐈‍⬛😊 i guess i do want to be a mum, I treat my cats like my children. So atleast I have that ! I have 2 very happy, very spoilt cats ! They bring me so much joy and love everyday. They make me laugh, too. They are very intelligent little animals. And good company. Im glad you have your cat babies 😊

@🪽AngelsWings🪽 This made me smile! You’re living the life! 🥲

Thats true. And also mental health just wasnt talked about really, was it? Not until fairly recently. Even now, ocd isnt very understood. But its getting better. I had to go through years of wrong treatment and no treatment for my actual problems. The ocd was never picked up on, because I wasnt washing my hands or rearranging my soup cans. I was just very lucky to eventually speak to someone who knew about ocd and treated it. But even after treatment, the legacy of suffering ocd most of my life without any treatment or medication or understanding, I need to live with all that. So even once ocd isnt actively destroying my life, the ramifications are undeniable. And there isnt any therapy for that side of it. I just try to count my blessings but I cant deny all the ways ocd messed up my life.