FUCK I was watching how to know if you’re bisexual and this girl was like I would always find girls really pretty and wanted to be like them but I’m retrospect it’s because I wanted them I’m triggeredddd

No same like I used to masterbate to girls I wished I looked like does that make me bi or lesbian I hope nott

@hiiiii Sis you know what u want when you get to peace. Seriously if you would like girls you would fallen in love with one. And u know what that feels like? Falling in love feels goood. So if u would like girls u would like the idea of falling in love with one and i dont think you like that thought. So idk this is just reassurances but... dont let them videos get to you becayse theyre ment for people who are really open to experementing and genuinely have feelings for the other sex. And the people who a are straight and watch those vids arent teiggered because they arent ocd.. so they just brush it off. And thats the difference between hocd peole and people with no mental ilness

@hocdgirlsummer Thanks o really want a boyfriend o just can’t get past what I’ve done in the past like ughh ocd

@hocdgirlsummer Do you know how to gain attraction back? Ive been struggling with it for a while now...

@hiiiii I watched a yt video of a very normalnteenage girl like this girl who normally does fashion vids very basic but one video she opened up bout masturbating and that its very normal to do it as a girl and how she watched porn and u jusr should watch what u get turned on by, for het it was lesbian. Porn but she is very straight and has a bf. https://youtu.be/qE_oqgKk4Lo this is the link to the vid

@lemondew Sis i havent gained attravtion bac at all sadly... im in a phase where hocd isnt really bombing my brain but its more coping with my loss of attracrion and dealing with the depression i got due to hocd and dealing with how i can live without being happy and gave passions and be excited for things like normal people. I let time heal me so i have to be patient for it to come back. I hope the pure genuine attraction to men i used to have comes back

@hocdgirlsummer Minute 5.19 exact

@hocdgirlsummer I have the same situation as you I'm not that anxious nor do I mind being a bi but I want my attraction to boys back.I pretty much almost cry when I can't get attracted to boys and I see them.

@lemondew Exaclty it hurts but i do mind being bi tho like All i want is to be me, all i want is to have my attraction and soul back. So i can get this out of my head and enjoy life the way it used to be thats all i want. And if im the old me that means no debating about being bi gay or straight. I was just straight and i didnt get triggered by someone calling me gay. Now i get triggered to the point i get a panic attack so... i have to get rid of the ocd and be the old me because im sure as hell not living my life like i am now for the rest Of it

@hocdgirlsummer Same. I never thought anything of being gay or homophobic rather I was supporting to whoever were in the community. Now whenever someone mentions lesbian/gay I get triggered even if it wasn't directed towards me

@lemondew Yeah everywhere the word is spilled i get triggeed

@hocdgirlsummer Also ever since I developed HOCD I can't stop looking at girls lips, body, hair. I also have this "gaydar" thing where I check whether the other girl is a lesbian or straight. It makes me uncomfortable but I do it subconsciously but I really don't want to. Like I wanna be with boys so badly

@hocdgirlsummer It's just so frustrating that before we never even thought about this but now everything has to or is about being gay or bi

@lemondew I do the same thing :( it’s just automatic almost.

@Ocdandme123 Ian so frustrated. Iike I just wanna be attracted to boys and live my life with them. I enjoy being with them. Every day I talk to boys but I don't feel attracted to them but I feel this kind of tight tension that I used to feel when I was starting to realize and developing feelings for boys (age 5)

@hocdgirlsummer When does your hocd started?

@lemondew Honey i know, i have the same its horrible. Its so triggering to us because were not used to this. Its like wtf but girls used to be like sisters and just friends and its very disturbing for our minds to suddenly see them as more thsn friends. U have every right to feel down and sad by this because it isnt normal, but never stop trying to heal❤️

@lemondew Its like i put on hocd’s glasses and suddenly this is hocd’s world snd not my world anymore. Everything i see around me is suddenly connected with sexualtiy

@Ruls Mine started un the beginning of 2018 maybe the end of 2017

@hocdgirlsummer But I mean, what situation started it? What happened?

@Ruls Ooh sorry lol, mine started... honestly idkk that well. It was a build up of things. I used to watch lesb porn and i searched on google what does that mean and google told me im gay. I was 13 or something but i was very strong boy obsessed so i knew it wasnt the case. But when i got 16 suddenly i remebered that that happened and i started questioning everything. Also i was on vacation in 2018 and then i saw this girl. She was pretty and suddenly my mind told me, omg ur into her. Andni got a major anxiety attack. Ever since then the attraction towatds men dissapeatd and the false attravtion to woman came in.

Well for me when inwatched the vid it didnt help because i was morenpissed about the fact thst if i saw tht vidoe earlier i provably wouldnt have gotten hocd. But now that its calming down it actually helped me know that its normal and nt in a reassuring way but in a way that i actually know that thats the case