The sick feeling will not stop

I (17M) post on here a lot and it is about the same fear I have about s3m3n.Everything I think I am in a good place to move forward and start getting better and more clean I mess it up and have a private moment in my bedroom which sends me into a spiral because it gets in my pants and I have to go wash my hand usually in the morning after I wake up after the night so it is gross because I sleep in it and then I walk around to get stuff and possibly spread it because of my dirty clothes and the bathroom and this morning I had to use someone else’s body wash so now that is contaminated and the shower curtain that touched my unclean arm and the handle. And Idk if this is normal but my OCD is making me so much more filthy despite me wanting to be clean because I clean up enough just to get by and do not deep clean and then I tell myself it’s fine and this has lead to me not washing my bed protector for MONTHS because I keep telling myself it’s fine even though it’s stained and dirty and my uncle sleeps in that room and it is disrespectful and filthy and yet I feel like I have created this mountain of filth that I cannot ever possibly hope to clean because no one believes that I can be dirty and my room is filthy the walls, my mattress which I have needed to throw out for so long because ai use to lay in my bare mattress and have private moments underneath my bed my window my desk everything and it just weighs so heavily on me because I have family that comes over and it consists of kids and like it is bottom to have that type of filth around kids it just makes me feel so much guilt that I do not want I need to clean my room my dirty clothes are on my bed but nothing feels like it is enough and it is my fault and I just want this to stop and I hear stories about people finding s3m3n stains on their hotel beds and people saying that you can clean it enough that someone does not notice it but is is still there which frightens me what if I am not clean well enough what if I spread to a crevice or to an object I cannot clean it throw away it sounds like paranoia but it is a really thing that could have happened because I am a gross kid and that is not OCD telling me that it is true and that makes my OCD so much worse and idk what to do.