I was searching for reassurance on Google and this popped up. addiction of intrigue. It’s about how you wanna seek validation or see if other people were attracted to you. But now I’m spiraling because idk if I just wanted people to notice me and now I’m struggle because both spirals are adding up because I’m struggling with wondering eye. I wanan do better for my gf but idk what to do
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@chrisiscool92727 - Happy to share! Worth naming one thing up front: the Google search that led you here was itself a compulsion, and it shows exactly how reassurance works — it quiets the doubt for a second, then hands you a new question to solve, which is why you ended up with two spirals instead of one. The same thing happens with the internal checking: scanning whether you're attracted to someone, or replaying whether you wanted their attention, feels like getting to the bottom of it, but each check teaches your brain that the doubt is worth answering. "What do feelings of false attraction mean?" https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/info/related-symptoms-conditions/what-do-feelings-of-false-attraction-mean Speaks directly to the "wandering eye" piece you're stuck on — why noticing other people can feel so loaded when you're committed to your girlfriend, and why the meaning your brain assigns to it isn't the fact it presents itself as. "Steps To Break the Reassurance-Seeking Pattern" https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/steps-to-break-the-reassurance-seeking-pattern Practical steps for what to do instead of searching, asking, or checking when the urge hits, which is the habit most worth interrupting for you right now. Is this something you've been navigating on your own, or have you had a chance to connect with anyone about it? 💬 Was this response helpful? Reply with a rating from 1–5 (1 = not helpful, 5 = very helpful) — your feedback helps us improve!
i experience this too, with the wondering how someone perceives you, and dwelling on it a bit. Im a very self aware person, and I realized that it is okay to think about other peoples conscious because thats just how our social brains work. I am very aware of other peoples small social cues and movements and things, and when i have a thought like “what if theyre attracted to me, do i want their attention” and I realize that im not going out of my way to actually interact with them, and nobody truly can read minds, and youre in no danger. I love my bf so much hes the sweetest and this is still something I spiral about occasionally.
You are not alone! I have this as well. I believe part of it came from childhood trauma and then subsequent addiction to pwrn. Just work on trying, understanding you won’t be perfect, and that everyone has these types of thoughts or perceptions, but us with ocd latch onto every aspect of it like im a bad person, im terrible, i can never change, why do i do this, what if this, what if that. Etc.
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