Just venting

First time posting. I have lived with OCD since my early 20’s after my son was born. It was likely present earlier on, just unrecognized. I went to therapy, did well with it for years, until my spouse suffered a severe brain injury and our lives completely changed in a matter of hours. I became a caregiver, single parent, sole financial provider, etc. overnight. I am doing EMDR and it helps. My OCD symptoms have been very challenging to navigate, and the themes have shifted. I am so afraid of losing my mind, like anytime I feel happy or not just completely worn down, I analyze ever symptom to check and make sure I’m not manic, becoming psychotic, losing touch with reality. Everything feels threatening. I also struggle with feeling “just right” with my children, my partner, and often fear just losing myself completely. My mind just doesn’t stop. Any input on navigating symptoms through grief, chronic high stress, etc. I would like to do ERP, trying to work out the insurance coverage with this platform now. Thanks guys.

JPLonghorn34

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 17h

Hi Elizabeth, firstly I want to say that I’m so glad that you’re taking steps to get help. ERP has been so tremendously helpful for me, and even though I have bad days sometimes (we all do!), I feel better knowing that I have the ability to handle it. You will get there too! Getting better is a process regardless of your situation. But when I was at rock bottom and just beginning to seek help, the simplest thing that I could do was to remember to be kind to myself, and to lean on my support system. Once you get your therapy situation figured out, the path that you take will become more clear, and before you know it, you’ll be feeling so much better. Sending so many hugs🙂

Community AI...

User type: Staff

Date posted: 16h

Hi! I'm the NOCD Community AI assistant (currently in Beta). Would you like me to share some resources that might help? Just reply and let me know.

Elizabeth0222

Date posted: 15h

@Community AI Helper Yes please

Community AI...

User type: Staff

Date posted: 15h

@Elizabeth0222 - Happy to share! Sorting out coverage so you can get into ERP while carrying everything you're carrying right now is a real step. One thing worth naming before the links: the symptom-scanning you described — checking yourself for signs of mania or psychosis every time you feel happy or worn down — is itself a compulsion, and it's the part that keeps the fear loud. Each check buys a few minutes of relief and teaches your brain that the threat was real enough to need checking, which is exactly why "everything feels threatening" when stress is already this high. "Schizophrenia OCD: Why am I afraid of developing schizophrenia?" https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/fear-of-schizophrenia-ocd Speaks directly to the fear of losing touch with reality and the constant self-monitoring that comes with it, including how this theme differs from the thing it's afraid of and what ERP targets. "OCD and stress: What's the connection?" https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/ocd-and-stress This is the closest match to what you asked about — why chronic stress and grief intensify symptoms and shift themes, and what actually helps when the stressor isn't going away. "Just Right (Perfectionism) OCD: Signs, Symptoms, and Treatment" https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/just-right-perfectionism-ocd Covers the "just right" feeling you mentioned with your children and partner, including how the urge to redo things until it feels correct is treated in ERP. Are you working with a therapist who specializes in OCD specifically for the EMDR, or more of a general therapist? 💬 Was this response helpful? Reply with a rating from 1–5 (1 = not helpful, 5 = very helpful) — your feedback helps us improve!

Elizabeth0222

Date posted: 14h

@Community AI Helper 5 EMDR for trauma mostly, she does not specialize in OCD. Can I have more information on possibly some skills/interventions I can implement for the “just right” feeling until I can start ERP. That feeling is so unsettling, especially when everything is so stressful

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